SHEPARD IS MY BATTLEMASTER; SHE HAS NO MATCH

I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"

Didn't realize they made emergency thermal blankets for babies

At this point it's more disappointing than shocking that not a single assassin in the states can aim a fucking gun

whoever said all-nighters are exhausting is a liar i'm doing great. i've never felt better in my entire life, the birds are chirping as they welcome me into the gates of morningdom

Everyone needs three hobbies: one to give you carpel tunnel, one to leave you sore and bruised, and one for your distant relatives to insist you monetize

Jerking off. Falling down the stairs. Fixing the wifi.

they invented Leon Kennedy so we can all be perverts together

get off of her (mount everest)!!!

girl 'mount' is literally in the name

her non-colonial name is sagarmatha. get off of her. go home.

Found abusive family

Sometimes a group of queer, traumatized people come together and beat the shit out of each other and do DARVO tactics to recreate what their parents did to them. And that's beautiful.

do people even call their children squirt anymore

take away the teeth and the eyes children don't have that anymore

We need to make puffy fat cheeks the new it girl beauty trend and give all those celebrities who sucked out their buccal fat body dysmorphia

jfc every "body positivity" post on this godforsaken site is BEING OVERWEIGHT IS SO HOT AND THIN PEOPLE SHOULD BE ASHAMED how fucking hard is it to be nice to one group without tearing other people down

cry more

Thin people should be ashamed and they should cut their own arms off

Wait…. 😳 there’s a way out?

Fuuuuuuck me. It’s through? And that’s the only way? Fuuuuuuuck dude

Still not what I want

god's weakest soldier is scrolling tumblr instead of being productive or participating in any of their hobbies

to everyone in the notes saying this is mean or rude or a callout, this post was autobiographical. we're in this together. take my paw