huh?

little miss auditory processing disorder would like you to repeat what you just said then immediately respond to you before you finish

not a caller not a texter but a secret third thing

don’t contact me. ever

i saw this somewhere else but reply / tag what you did today so everyone can see that we all did something different today

the thing about phone in bed is that it's so awesome. almost makes you feel like betraying & destroying yourself for nothing isn't all so bad

Hanging out with people will make you remember you're the crazy woke friend for like. not wanting to shop at shien

Dead wife but it's a flashback to an amazing sandwich you had 3 years ago

Maybe if I just work harder, this empty cup will pour again

Maybe the cup needs a bit of time to rest and refill?

Maybe the cup needs to lock the fuck in???

In 2026, the chicest thing a gay actor can do is never explicitly come out as gay but also make it abundantly clear that he is. Coming out is too modern. Staying closeted is too old fashioned. But this method merges contemporary freedom with Old Hollywood glamour and allure, and it weeds out the dumbest people who truly don’t get it. I call it the Pascal Method.

i need to age regress to 18 and do a bachelors degree correctly this time and get a million dollar job the moment i graduate and make 2000 friends who all love and worship me and find the artifact and defeat the evil mastermind and slay the ape

everything will probably be fine but i have to get really anxious just in case

It’s actually crazy how bad feeling bad feels