seventh heaven

LMAOOO if i’m being honest i have some of it written out (and by that i mean very tiny passages from random parts throughout the fic thrown together in the google doc) but it’s very much not … a serious fic like if anything i think it’s a silly self indulgent cracky au that’s basically just another pwp but with some extra steps. i have the general plot in my head but i have some other fics i want to work on more atm!!! >_< so those are taking priority for me

lol yeah i haven’t really put too much thought into the “how” part but richie blows his cover and carmy finds out he’s been the guy religiously attending every single one of carmy’s streams and funding a portion of his rent for months and richie also finds out about the fat long term crush carmy’s been harboring on him… and then they get together (read: fuck it out)

no i also fully believe he’d be a mess when it comes to any sort of sexual intimacy like tears in his eyes shaking all over pliant and malleable and content to let the other person take the reins … the degree of trust and vulnerability required for sex is a big deal for him even if he doesn’t outwardly show it and that level of intimacy is definitely foreign especially coupled with his inexperience it’s why when i write carmy and richie fucking i still go out of my way to include a degree of tenderness to it too because aside from me being sappy and softhearted carmy needs that :/ he needs someone to be slow and patient and baby him and pay attention to what he actually needs rather than what he thinks he wants. like of course i think if someone were to be mean to him or treat him badly in bed he would just as easily comply and take it because he’s just Like That but it’s like.. i think it takes a lot for him to fall into bed with someone and even though in a lot of carmrich fics their sexual relationship starts out very impulsively/casually/whatever it just makes sense because there’s already so much history between them and despite everything carmy trusts him. he’s NOT actually cut out for casual “emotionally detached” sex even if he agreed to it on a verbal level i think the practice would exponentially fuck him up. i am mean to carmy on a daily basis but i physically cannot bring myself to add onto his trauma by giving him bad sex experiences like okay stupid little gayboy i’ll let you have this one thing

i need him i want nothing to do with him he’s so criminally ugly i would fuck him into the mattress he’s a thirty year old virgin loser i want to hear him moan like a girl he’s suffered more than jesus he hasn’t suffered enough he’s an active detriment to society he’s just some guy and a product of his environment i want him to heal i want to run him over in my car he’s done nothing wrong he’s the root of every problem i could fix him i’m choosing to make him worse