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@captainsugaraddict

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irritating as fuck when people get mad at Black people existing in premodern historical fiction/fantasy media. like first of all, you're racist. and second of all, you are acting as though Black people didn't exist in premodern Europe which is simply false. especially when we're talking about the Mediterranean, like what the fuck do you people think is along the southern half of the Mediterranean Ocean?? everyone's on boats, there are GOING to be interactions with Black people in Northern Africa, and there are GOING to be Black people in Mediterranean Europe. stop being stupid. your imagined homogeneous white European past is not historical reality, get over it you massive losers
I watched a 2-year-old for the weekend. Mom claims 2yo is pretty emotional and cries often. Don’t really see that during stay. Occasional normal kid stuff but always resolved quickly. I noticed she occasionally asked to play on her iPad but as a babysitter I felt it was more responsible for me to say “not right now, we’re going to [activity, game, tidy up].” So there was no iPad or TV for three days. And a lot of it was independent play. She would color and read and play with toys without me for long stretches. (Once she told me she was “busy” and she was just observing a keychain and taking in its contours.)
Her mom and dad return and give her iPad on first request. She plays with it peacefully while adults talk. Mom moves to take it away for bedtime and it’s immediate tantrum. Screaming and crying tears. The screaming continues all the way to bathtime and bed. Mom and Dad have to cajole her with a snack and lots of attention for about twenty minutes before her crying stops.
Now, I want to be fair to these parents: toddler is overwhelmed by Mom and Dad returning from a, by her standards, “long” time away. It’s getting late, toddler is tired and maybe actually did need that snack. Toddlers also just act different around babysitters than they do mom and dad.
But for a toddler who was a pleasant and attentive kid for three days to dissolve into tantrum of that length as soon as she is reunited with and then separated from her iPad freaks me out. She is not a teen upset she can’t communicate with her friend. She’s not even a grade-schooler who didn’t save their Minecraft world. She’s a toddler who is distressed by being separated from an overstimulation machine.
Her parents have convinced themselves it’s a tool and a convenience by handing it to her and gaining silence at mealtimes and car rides and every request when she’s a bright kid who can spend just as much time with a book as with a screen, with much less distress at separation.
Idk, maybe there are people out there who are actually having great experiences with their kids with iPads but if I wasn’t turned off from iPads before, damn I am now. I felt so WEIRD and UPSET seeing that sweet kid scream like that. It was totally against everything I knew about her personality, but totally in line with everything her mom had warned me about.
anyway das alnatura pesto schmeckt wie rasenschnitt. "ohne käse und knoblauch" ja merkt man
i will never be over the fact that during first contact a human offered their hand to a vulcan and the vulcan was just like “wow humans are fucking wild” and took it
Humanity’s first contact with Vulcans was some guy going “I’m down to fuck.”
Vulcans’ first contact with Humans was an emphatic “Sure.”
@sineala
#iiiiiiiiiiiiii mean vulcans had been watching humans for a long time#they knew the significance of a handshake but still#they had to find some fast and loose ambassador#willing to fuckin make out with a human for the sake of not offending them on first contact#lmao#star trek give me the story of this fast and loose vulcan
“sir…these…these humans…they greet each other by…” *glances around before furtively whispering* “by clasping hands…”
*prolonged silence* “oh my…”
“sir…sir how will we make first contact with them? surely we…we cannot refuse this handclasping ritual, they will take it as an insult, but what vulcan would agree to such a distasteful and uncomfortable ritual??”
*several pensive moments later* “contact the vulcan high command and tell them to send us kuvak. i once saw that crazy son of a bitch arm wrestle a klingon, he’ll put his hands on anything”
Elsewhere, w/ kuvak: “….my day has come.”
The vulcan who made first contact with humans is named Solkar guys. Y’all just be makin’ up names for characters that already have names.
Bonus: here’s a screencap of Solkar doing the “my body is ready” pose right before he shakes Zefram Cochrane’s hand:
I swear Vulcans only come in two types and they are “distant xenophobes” or “horny on main for humanity”. Also apparently this guy is Spock’s great-grandfather and frankly that explains everything.
Hey so I looked into this at one point and that handshake literally created a lifelong telepathic bond between the two of them, and basically all of Solkar’s descendants were later obsessed with humans, including freaking SPOCK, so I’m not saying that handshake was so gay and good that it created an intergenerational telepathic bond between Solkar’s descendants and humans, but I’m also not….not….saying that.
actual footage of first contact makeouts
The slow deliberation with which Solkar takes Cockrane’s–I’m sorry, Cochrane’s–hand… The sheer sensuality witch which Solkar infuses an otherwise borderline impersonal social ritual… It clearly shows a very conscious knowledge, on Solkar’s part, of what the significance of the handshake is in Vulcan terms and of how affected he is by it.
That’s why he’s so slow in doing it, and so sensual. A part of Solkar can’t believe this is happening, despite it being a perfectly logical thing to expect from a human, and the rest of him can’t believe how good it is.
I bet that if the camera zoomed in any further we would see the dilation of Solkar’s pupils and a quickly-repressed shiver of delight. Cochrane’s firm, businesslike clasp is probably (in sexual terms) being perceived as a deliciously carnal display of dominance.
No wonder Solkar is all like, “TAKE ME, YOU WILD-MANNERED BARBARIAN WITH ENTICINGLY ROUGH CALLUSES.”
And so we find out that yes, there is such a thing as bottoming in Pon-farr.
Every time this post comes round my dash, it just gets better.
#somehow the idea of vulcans being Horny On Main always gives me the giggles#like literally all they had to do#was be like actually#hand contact is very intimate for our species#and im p sure humanity as a whole would not find that insurmountably weird#there are human cultures that dont shake hands#vulcans are logical enough to think that through on their own#so clearly that vulcan was just down to fuck#down to fuck in a public#professional diplomatic situation no less#and he did not fucking care who knew it (via kittykatthetacodemon)
Some Vulcan: we could probably just explain that handshakes are intimate in our culture
Solkar, rubbing lip gloss on his hand: don’t tell me how to do my job

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My coworker had managed to catch 3 out of 4 kittens that a neighborhood semi-feral popped out 5 weeks ago. So now they are at work to be tamed and found new homes.
does anyone else think about how brave all their friends are and get really emotional about it
I'm glad everyone is alive rn
insane to me how, to some people, this is not a common sense
*walks into your Lauchzwiebel-sized house with eingerahmten pictures of Lauchzwiebeln on the walls covered in Lauchzwiebel-colored wallpaper and holds a microphone up to your Lauchzwiebel-shaped mouth* Hi, hallo, what's ihre opinion on zhe Lauchzwiebeln?
hiii!!! :D I, uh-- (notices your url) (starts sweating) i. um. Well ! (breath quickens) I. Think they are . Quite neat. Ha 😀 (glances nervously to the side to gauge your reaction) But ☝️ (tries to save my skin and my skin and my skin and my skin and my skin and my sk-) of course the glorious beetroot is wonderful too-- (remembers šaltibarščiai exists) and we mix quite well 😁
this year’s prom theme is… *opens envelope* Great Lakes Invasive Species And What Boaters Can Do To Stop Them
And the subject of tonight’s ecology panel is *turns on powerpoint* Enchantment Under the Sea

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full offense but mina didn't spend the last fucking quarter of the novel doing literally every single fucking thing she could to keep herself in good spirits after her assault (even after she's been deemed unclean by the heavens) and taking everything dracula forced on her (especially the telepathic link) and turning it against him to help her loved ones kick his fucking ass just for dracula adaptations to go "but what if they had a sexy dark romance <3 what if she was the reincarnation of his dead wife <3" what if you go fuck yourself. what then
This is why Pride is not just a party. It's a joyful celebration, but it's also a pointed and colourful two-finger salute to a world that stood back whilst so many of us died. And we'll never go quietly, never again.
Well as long as we’re talking about the ancient internet, who remembers this.
… I just realised that some of my mutuals are Too Young to get flashbacks from this. I hate the internet.
Robot Unicorn Attack is from 2010. The window for ‘ancient’ keeps getting smaller. Anyway, All your base are belong to us.
I’m a simple person, i see the delightful duo that are flamboyant and nerdy Erasure, and reblog to share the love. Whether you discovered them via a scrubs episode or a flash animation, seek out more. It’s all wierd and wonderful.
snoopy of the day

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