*screams*
hello vonnie
Sade Olutola
almost home

Love Begins

titsay

oozey mess

shark vs the universe
Jules of Nature
will byers stan first human second

PR's Tumblrdome

#extradirty

Xuebing Du
art blog(derogatory)
đŞź
Three Goblin Art
trying on a metaphor

romaâ

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@captainhottestpants
*screams*

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all these clothing stores with their 'boyfriend shirts', 'boyfriend hoodies', 'boyfriend sweatpants', 'boyfriend shorts' - every two minutes someone's poor boyfriend is being divested of his clothes for resale and left cold and naked and confused somewhere
it would be so fucking embarrassing if we meet aliens and they are like wow you guys have the same technology as we did 300 gyroaays (unit of time) ago, that's awesome. and we are like wooo that's so cool and they are like yeah so what are your thoughts on electrons and glorons and we just like missed glorons and they are so important and easy to discover but we missed it and have eben fuccking around and they laigh at our shitty science built around the gaping wound that is the absence of glorons
it is time for my periodic bout of thinking about them
Had a dream that markiplier was struck by lightning and imbued with electrical abilities. People were encouraging him to use his powers for good but he just went back to playing videogames. All the videos were about three minutes long because as soon as he got jumpscared there'd be a brilliant blue flash and he'd fry his computer.

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Scientist on the ship: listen you laugh at the regulations but one time a woman DID try to tale a penguin home with her. I swear. She got it on the ship and was keeping it in her bathroom.
Me: that's WILD. These bathrooms aren't up to spec for penguins even overnight
Scientist: ...how would you know that
Me, realizing I'm about to get to tell my story about managing a hotel when there was an emergency stopover for penguin transport and we were the only place in the area with bathrooms that would work for the night:
I've always thought it's too bad that disco is the only kind of dance that comes with an artifact. It's compelling that disco has a Ball. I want to know what secrets will be revealed if I gaze into it. There should be a hip-hop Cube. A ballroom Amulet. A swing Diadem.
If you were the handsome blonde flag bearer in yellow at the Battle of Prestonpans Jacobites Rising of 1745 Iâm sorry if I knew you and didnât recognise you if thatâs why you kept staring at me, I didnât want to wave during the battle and look like a fool
THIS WAS A REENACTMENT
My favorite review of Iron Lung I saw in an Instagram comment section

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I was unaware of Markiplier telling his fans that they better behave in the theaters which is hilarious to me because I've been joking with my staff that if the people for Iron Lung acted up in our theater I was going to email Markiplier like a disappointed teacher
I work at a theater and despite full showings we have barely had to clean them because people don't leave trash. no complaints from anyone about other customers being loud/obnoxious. every customer who has bought a ticket for iron lung has been polite. i'm so incredibly proud not only of Markiplier but also the fanbase. thanks guys, as both a Mark fan and movie employee
*slides this across the table* you're going to want to read this
There are Experiences behind this sign
"It would be a shame if protesters started wearing safety glasses, hard hats, respirators, and gardening gloves, all of which can be found at the hardware stores. It would be a shame if they started using traffic cones (the kind without the hole in the top), upside down buckets, or other improvised lids to contain teargas by placing them over the canisters.
It would be a shame if protesters learned that police scanners are legal to own in the US, allowing them to learn where police are moving, and what routes they intend to take. It would be a shame if they discovered that these scanners can be used to send as well as receive, allowing them to flood the scanner frequencies with noise.
All of this would be a terrible, terrible shame.
âIt would be an awful shame if you copied and pasted this, so that they couldnât delete the original and all linked posts (again).â
... the worst bit is I know several people this could be, especially given the 'in Australia' clarification
If you know them then there's a chance I might know some of them and that thought will keep me up at night.
This wasnât the guy who we all know who used to spray his jeans with Mortein and then light himself on fire, was it?
He used to sit at the back of the bus, cup his hand, spray deodorant into it, then open it and light it on fire with a lighter in one fell swoop to try and impress girls.
He had to stop because the bus company begged our school to tell him to stop bc of legal liability. His hands never actually got damaged after doing it for about a year.
I reached out to my old friend in question here, because I've been thinking about him all day.
I do not know what "the amulet" is. I have no idea what "the amulet" is referring to.
I instantly remembered when he said that.
While we were all at the local park doing legal things that teenagers would do back in the late 2000s, my friend here found a rock at our old smoke spot that was unusually smooth and flat. He liked it so much that he took it to the woodwork classrooms at school, drilled a hole in it, and hung it on a necklace.
When we asked why he weanwearing this dinky-ass pebble on his neck, he claimed it prevented him from ever getting food-related illnesses: wouldn't get food poisoning, couldn't over-eat, was able to ingest anything (prior to him finding The Amulet, a few of us used to play a game called "Devil's Piss" where we would take turns shoving random food bits into a bottle of coke, and the first person to take a sip would get two dollars from the other players).
When we all asked him for the proof that this rock is magicalâbecause nobody believed him, obviouslyâhe said to meet him behind the History block at lunch, where he said he would drink two litres (or half a gallon) of milk in one go and not puke.
We met him there, and about ten of us all watched him down a whole bottle of strawberry milk in two or three breaths.
He didn't puke.
He jumped up and down and punched his stomach to prove it.
He still didn't puke.
I'm so glad I'm alive.

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one curiousity search on ebay to see if people are still going nuts over beanie babies has led to getting a strong contender for the funniest email ever
When your doctor prescribes you the generic
I think Joan of Arc's fursona would be a dog called Joan of Bark, but my partner thinks it would be a phoenix, which seems insensitive to me, but neither of us are furries, so I guess we don't really get a say either way.
I promise Iâm not trying to be pretentious here. Jeanne dâArcâs last name is dâArc. An overly-literal translator insisted it stood for âof Arcâ, and thatâs why we know her as Joan of Arc. At the time, she was more commonly known as âJeanne la Pucelleâ, meaning âJoan the Maidenâ or âJoan the Virginâ.
anyways since her main attack strategy was âhit them until they stop movingâ I think sheâd be a gorilla.
*taking notes* What else do you know about this beautiful world?