Happy To Be Alive

my favorite thing is when people from your high school who got married at 20 and have three kids at 22 post shit like “living with your significant other isn’t all fun it’s constant fighting and discomfort and never being happy! constant misery is natural and expected don’t get your hopes up! buy these pyramid scheme beauty products btw”

About five times a year, I re-learn that Jimmy Kimmel and Jimmy Fallon are different people.

cats opening doors with their faces is astounding. you got four paws little fool.

Men will legit be like “why were you nice to me if you didn’t want to fuck me” like……

Under capitalism, we are all the April Fool

be so completely yourself that everyone else feels safe to be themselves too

for april fools we’re deleting this entire site sayonara you weeaboo shits

This might come as a shock but I’m Not Feelin too good my dudes

a good april fools prank is sending my paypal money

friendly reminder that you don’t have to wait until it’s dark all through the house to practice sneaking and creeping. sneak during the day time. your stealth skill is yours to raise and you don’t have to abide by anyone’s rules but your own

Date the androgynous being with wild hair like pine needles and has the night sky under their eyes, who rarely speaks but has all the power of the forest in their words.