Wot

why the FUCK is there a big spider on my bedroom wall it doesn't look like any spider i've ever seen in my entire life what the fuck

are you sure it's a spider?

oh that's a wolf spider. they taste like celery and pork and they aren't poisonous.

why is it in my room

and why do you know what it tastes like

@sicklythiasus why do you know what a wolf spider tastes like

nom nom.

what

yummy yummy in my tummy tummy

when and why did you eat a wolf spider

why was your solution to eat them

i mean, no one else was gonna.

VIBE CHECK! *yearns deeply for you from an unfortunate distance*

if i was being followed around by a bard who clearly loved me with his whole heart i would simply confess my own undying love for him and then we’d run away to the coast together....it’s that simple

RIP to Geralt of Rivia but I’m different

Oh here it is again. The best video ever

@ruthless-rage

Must… reblog… always…

@quarra @xantissa the sounds… it’s so cute!

If this is going around and I don’t reblog it, something is wrong

11. is just a really sweet person 12. no really my dad worked with him on firewall as the tech advisor and he was just a really swell guy 13. got my mom’s birth date from my dad and sent her flowers 14. he sent my mom flowers for her birthday 15. he didn’t even know her he just wanted to be sweet

this was a beautiful and necessary edition to this post thank you oh my god

Awwwww

When he was asked to be in Jimmy Kimmel’s “I’m Fucking Ben Affleck” video, in which he pulled up alongside them in a car and gave Jimmy a little wink and an air-kiss, when he showed up at the set he looked kind of put out. Kimmel was afraid he wasn’t down with what they were asking. But he just said, “I don’t know, this wardrobe…don’t you have anything mesh that I could wear?”

Local Carpenter Stumbles Into Stardom, Worries This May Interfere With His Carpentry

You had me at number one

why does this have 32k notes? it’s just a picture of a knife in a ranch bottle, is there some unspoken joke that 32 thousand people share? what is going on here, i dont get it. it’s just a fucking picture of a knife in a ranch bottle. is there some spiritual connection people have to this picture? is there some ominous and mystical reasoning that this has 32 thousand notes? do people reblog this because it makes them look like some indie blogger? or is there just something funny to this? someone please explain

no one tell him

Scheduling this to post on March 15 because it needs to happen.

The ides of March have come

E tu Brute ?

ehh what the hell

I need to believe in the heart of the post…

Oh? Well… *reblag*

i reblogged this and now my uncle is giving me 250 to dye my hair nani the fucko

I have nothing to lose

my palm was itchin today not riskin it

I always reblog the money posts cause I can’t afford not too lol

It works. I just got $300 for no reason.

Money dog is my friend

Money dog is the shit

I believe in the money dog😀

I believe in the money 🐶

Bless me pls money pup 🙏🐕

Pplease😭🙏🏽

Doing this again because last time I reblogged this I got $50

can’t not reblog the money dog

Someone handed me 20 bucks today to donate to charity!

I’m always so skeptical about these things but also desperate so why not

The way my bank account about to look after I pay rent…I ain’t got shit to lose🤧

SOOOOO REAL SHIT I GOT THE JOB I APPLIED FOR YESTERDAY‼️ THE MONEY DOG IS REAL BABYYY 😭

Why not

Sure let’s try

Yerrrrrrr

took my cat to the vet the other day and the vet goes “well I don’t see anything wrong here…. he’s just a VERY handsome boy” & i almost teared up

Diagnosed with handsome boy disease

i can tell you right now that these are rich people. it’s not the hot tub in the background. it’s not even the money suit. it’s the fact that both girls are dressed and styled like women in their 40s. seriously, i have two cousins who are rich as hell and this is how they dress. ive seen pictures of groups of them flocked together, usually somewhere with a golf course in the background, every last one of them dressed exactly like their mothers. i dont know why. but i can tell you right now with absolute certainty these girls went to a debutante ball and have had their own horse since they were 10. they named it trudy or something. i know all this because those girls are about to leave the house looking like the desperate housewives and nobody sees anything wrong with that 

Damn, chill^ I purchased my first horse as a child with birthday funds, lets save all that salt for fries honey.

“my first horse”

Before January ends, I’m going to magically and extremely be blessed by the universe.

not gonna risk scrolling past this

We're embarrassed

we're gonna get yelled at for telling the truth anyway (because it involves some ADHD fuck-up or other)

the crushing fear of rejection we think will happen if we dont give the “correct” answer even if there is literally no wrong answer

oh. Oh

This is very true

here's a random word generator--whatever word it gives you is now the thing you are the deity of

goddess of loop

God of bottoms

Goddess of Reflect

Goddess of plug