The Citizen Twelve Podcast

Nuanced refrain – Personal variation in what it is to be sober and in what sequenceDesirability of abstinence – inherent and tacit Host: Paige R. Hulsey Real Rent: https://www.realrentduwamish.org Link to our steps: http://www.c12pod.com Music from Elijah: www.instagram.com/elijah_seattle Written, engineered, and edited by Paige R. Hulsey

Nuanced refrain – Personal variation in what it is to be sober and in what sequence

Desirability of abstinence – inherent and tacit

Host: Paige R. Hulsey

Real Rent: https://www.realrentduwamish.org

Link to our steps: http://www.c12pod.com

Music from Elijah: www.instagram.com/elijah_seattle

Written, engineered, and edited by Paige R. Hulsey

Q&A conclusion to this miniseries! The beginning, middle and not end of amending.

What about when a direct amend isn’t appropriate (or possible)?

What about when the person I’ve harmed has also harmed me?

Do I have to do whatever they say about ‘making it right’?

What about mid-course corrections versus fresh start amending?

Why is the temptation so strong to skip right to the ninth step?

Please…

Miniseries! The beginning, middle and not end of amending.

Staying amended

Loose ends and anxiety

Why amending doesn’t end – step ten

Host | Paige R. Hulsey

Recovery Patterns of Codependence: http://coda.org/default/assets/file/foundational%20documents/2011%20patterns%20of%20recovery%20%202015.pdf

Real Rent: https://www.realrentduwamish.org

Link to our steps: http://www.c12pod.com

Music from…

Miniseries! The beginning, middle and not end of amending.

More on making the approach

The talk

Host: Paige R. Hulsey

Real Rent: https://www.realrentduwamish.org

Link to our steps: http://www.c12pod.com

Music from Elijah: www.instagram.com/elijah_seattle

Written, engineered, and edited by Paige R. Hulsey

Miniseries! The beginning, middle and not end of amending.

Methods of preparation – the letter, the card

The approach

Host: Paige R. Hulsey

Real Rent: https://www.realrentduwamish.org

Link to our steps: http://www.c12pod.com

Music from Elijah: www.instagram.com/elijah_seattle

Written, engineered, and edited by Paige R. Hulsey

Miniseries! The beginning, middle and not end of amending.

Why is amending so scary? Facing consequences in direct opposition to getting away with something and dealing with that picture we get in our minds

Why does amending feel so weird? Addressing contexts and meta communications

How do I find the willingness? Use of will and willpower

Host: Paige R. Hulsey

Real Rent: https://www.realrentduwam…

Miniseries! The beginning, middle and not end of amending.

Why even do this part of the work?

Being our ideals

Restoration, reintegration

Host: Paige R. Hulsey

Real Rent: https://www.realrentduwamish.org

Link to our steps: http://www.c12pod.com

Music from Elijah: www.instagram.com/elijah_seattle

Miniseries! The beginning, middle and not end of amending.

Empowering context for self-reflection: freckles not cancer

What the list is: I did the wrong thing and was harm caused.

What the list isn’t: people whose feelings I hurt or people I didn’t do the right thing by but didn’t actually harm, only people I’m looking to continue a relationship with or willing or able to go and see, only people…

C12Pod: 018 Lying Follow-up

In this episode we discuss:

When we’ve lied – false equivalencies, a meditation to support staying lightly attached, the perils of desensitization, isolation, and defensiveness

General traps and pitfalls – being discerning versus judgemental, or uncommunicative versus prudent, secretive versus private

When we’ve been lied to – being responsible for not remaining in harm’s way and being free to…

In this episode we discuss:

Different types of lies – outright, lies of omission, lies to self (delusion), and dishonest behaviors

Hidden harms of lying – stress, exhaustion, loneliness, pain, delay of growth, distorted relationship with self and others, and dehumanization

What it takes to live without lying – being interested and present, practicing other principles (giving up managing and…

C12Pod: 016 Injurious Behaviours Follow-up

Note: In this recording we say the show will be about lying (again) and it isn’t. We apologize for being unclear. Our next episode, seventeen, will indeed be about lying. Thank you for hanging in with us!

In this episode we discuss:

Risks of ignoring the reality of harm

Reasons harm is ignored or denied, including, ‘if I’m hurt, there’s something wrong with me’ and ‘if I caused harm, I’ll haveto…

C12Pod: 015 Injurious Behaviours

In this episode we discuss:

Why it’s useful to address behaviours rather than character defects

Fear as motive for behaviour

The (disproportionate) fear cycle

Fear motivated habits

Barriers to new ways of being

Why it’s the actions that count

Complexity around damage

Note: We are not hiding that our understanding of today’s content continued to unfold during recording more than usual. We invite…

C12Pod: 014 Prayer Follow-up

In this episode we discuss:

The Serenity Prayer

The Lord’s Prayer

The Saint Francis Prayer

The Set Aside Prayer

Emily’s childhood prayer

I love you, I trust you, I smile

God, please direct my attention to something useful

Host: Paige R. Hulsey | Cohost: Emily R. Bogen

The Work of Byron Katie: thework.com

Real Rent: https://www.realrentduwamish.org

Link to our steps: http://www.complexiphy.org/c12

In this episode we discuss prayer, including:

The following common questions – ‘Don’t I need to know what I’m praying to?’, ‘Why am I embarrassed about praying?’, ‘What about when I get bored with praying?’, ‘I pray but it isn’t working, what’s the deal?’

Our experience over time with prayer including using set prayers, praying in gratitude, for others, for ourselves, and how we strive to pray…

C12Pod 012: Meditation Follow-up

In this episode we discuss three common pitfalls around meditation:

Trap # 1: Rigidity

Trap # 2: Feeling bad about how we meditate!

Trap # 3: Complex consequences

Host: Paige R. Hulsey | Cohost: Emily R. Bogen

Real Rent: https://www.realrentduwamish.org

Link to our steps: http://www.complexiphy.org/c12

Music from Elijah: www.instagram.com/elijah_seattle

Two Way Prayer: https://www.twowayprayer…

In this episode, we discuss:

Common Contexts

Incomplete Conceptions

Rigidity and perfectionism

Focus is on the the sitting

It has to be the same every day, day after day, forever

Our Additions

Gentleness

It’s all about when we’re not sitting

Whatever it takes to make sure there’s space to get more coming through

Our experience

Why we began meditating

Practice ups and downs

Creativity –…