BooshGoose

basketball players fight over the basketball because they are hypnotized before each game to believe it is their egg

Sex is great but have you considered hitting me as hard as you can

"you wouldn't want that in real life" yeah i know it's called playing pretend, try to keep up

We are the puppies of the fat dogs you ragebaited

"the best laid plans" "i'm hatching a plan" so a plan is a type of egg ? 🥚

I blasted a bug off the ceiling with my white hot spludge!

The world is made of objects and ideas but nobody knows how they are related

you probably thought today was a normal Monday. nooooope. strong as fuck ice mummy again, sorry.

lol check this out if i put my arm in this machine it rips it right off like its nothing

my dog has eaten so many pizza rolls in his life i think he thinks they are dog treats and that’s why he is so flabbergasted every time he sees me eating them. hes like what the fuck do you think you’re doing with those

Someone laid a perfectly smooth pristine egg in the middle of the moshpit tonight and we just kept circling it

gonna be so real i did not realize the bottom was about purchasing and shipping automobile parts. I thought they were straight up intending to kill and dismantle the UPS truck like some auto mechanic apex predator.