what a bloody cross to bear: time on my hands but i don't care

why does every single one of your faves has to have a monster cock. some of them are packing peanuts and that's okay, just goes to show you a lot of you equate big penises with a better sexual performance. alas, we move on

Oh my god. Finally. Hoping I can hold onto front for most of today but my head already hurts, and I'm not sure why. If I end up driving today I have no idea how that's going to go, but it'll be worth trying

Also realizing that he was talking about making dinner today and I'm a little bit more apprehensive about that, but, apparently he's been doing fairly well with the frozen pierogies, so maybe it'll be fine...?

*describing some learned fellow i'm acquainted with* he's very articulate *remembers when he crossed me* i mean verbose

‘Nuclear Family Month’ is so funny as a concept. I have never seen a nuclear family worth celebrating.

DMV Line Appreciation Month. National Root Canal Month.

i havent done anything or been anyone ever

four line sentences are good and okay. its cool. you dont need to end your setnence or that thought! add another comma or an em dash. everything will be okay. it makes sense and flows well. #awesome #mybehemothsentence

if you were a mouse, these will be the dinosaurs…

I have never, and will never, use "ofc" to mean "of fucking course". It literally stands for OF Course...