BPD CONFESSIONS

Hello, this is a blog for those of us with BPD to submit confessions.

TAGGING SYSTEM:

You will be able to search for certain confessions from separate tags. Confessions will be sorted into:

#bpdfpconfessions - Confessions related to a favourite person

#bpdthoughtconfessions - Confessions related to experiencing upsetting thoughts, brief episodes of strange experiences, hallucinations, and delusions.

#bpdimpulseconfessions - Confessions related to the impulse patterns of us borderlines.

#bpdswingconfessions - Confessions related to severe mood swings.

#bpdsplitconfessions - Confessions related to splitting.

#bpdpositivityconfessions - Confessions which are positive. Made 4/5/25.

All will also be tagged with #bpdconfessions - the list may get added to as submissions get added.

ANON SYSTEM:

6/5/25, I have added an anon system. You must tag your emoji(s) and then what words your emoji(s) are. Please try to keep it unique- eg something which won't be assosiated with another tag.

ACTIVE ANONS;

#maskinganon - unknown/11/25

#🦈🪫( @fearfulandcowardly-anon )

#purpleheartanon

#mapleanon - 2/9/25

INACTIVE ANONS;

#cryingcanadiananon / 😭🇨🇦

#tulipanon

#cakesuitcaseanon - 27/8/25

#hyacinthanon - 7/9/25

GUIDELINES:

If your confession details gore/violence, do not go into extreme detail.

This is for BPD. Do not submit a confession to do with another disorder.

This disorder is a fucking curse.

I tried to kms the other day and no one gave a fuck. I disappeared off most places where my friends are and I KNOW that they hate me (my last post was abt how I attempted and was getting sent to the hospital. I know multiple of my friends didn't want me to die. Because they're fucking EVIL selfish assholes who hate me and WANT ME GONE)

so now I have nowhere to go:) how many times do I have to try to die before people care? They'll all leave me, I might as well try again

🦈🪫( @fearfulandcowardly-anon )

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I have such complicated feelings about my fp who is sadly my ex. I can't tell if this is limerence or if I still love them. Im scared my bf will find out about these feelings and leave me. I know the reason my fp left the relationship with me and my bf was because of them not being able to handle long distance but I feel its partially my fault as when I started dating them, I took parts of their personality and made it my own and I know that hurt them bc they also had bpd and was struggling with their personality. I wish I could tell them I'm sorry and that I miss them but I know my bf would probably leave me for these feelings I can't control.

That's it, I just needed to get that off my chest, thank you for listening

- Purple Heart Anon / 💜 Anon

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— 🚧🐾 (warning sign paws anon)

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I don't want to self-diagnose myself because I don't want to overstep on people who actually have BPD, and I'm worried that I'll lose friendships if I do get diagnosed. The friend that does have BPD rarely speaks to me anymore, and one friend said that they would cut ties if someone they knew had BPD because their grandma had it/was suspected to have it. I don't even think I have the money to go to a professional in the first place, so I'm stuck spiraling and having possible split eps. It just sucks.

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like,, why do you like a show that endorses r@pe? why do you need a man to form your own opinions? you both claim to not be lovers yet still say the most vile,horny shit about each other. yet youre so mad because i made fun of someone we hate...?

i just know you all talk behind my back too. its okay,, ill do it too if thats what it takes.

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i probably have both DID and BPD. that's probably not helping. i just can't see a doctor about this stuff. the mental healthcare in my area is a nightmare and ive learned not to tell my docs too much so they don't send me to the horrible psych ward nearby again.

ugh. i just want to be normal. i want to have relationships without things sending me into a fogged up spiral of strong black and white emotions that choke me out and make me feel like i have to cut people out of my life bc of the smallest arguments or disagreements or triggers. i miss the people that have left me because of my mental health. i feel so guilty every day just for existing and being a force of harm in these people's lives. i feel so guilty for being suicidal because it makes everyone want to avoid me when i try to confide in them about it. i feel so fucking guilty just for feeling anything that i shove it all down inside of me until i split at the fuckin seams and explode toxic waste all over my loved ones.

i just wanna be happy, yk? it just doesn't feel possible.

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i recently ( dec 07 ) got a long distance partner who is great, she's beautiful, she's kind, she takes things the speed i want, and she slowly grew to be my favorite person

well

she told me about this girl making her uncomfortable, i decided to put it in my own hands because she told me i was allowed to, i recently got her to back off my girlfriend and defriend her. though, that friend told her mom that I'm a guy out of state trying to groom her! i am a AFAB non-binary who leans towards masculinity which is why i use he/him in the first place, i am also a minor and my girl is almost an adult!

i've been told what i did was fucked up, but my girlfriend allowed it, i did what made her happy, i feel no remorse for what happened. though, my girlfriend ended up getting grounded because of it and now I'm just angry because i can't talk to her for 2 whole goddamn weeks.

- 🍁 ( maple anon, sorry i forgot to put a name! )

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I’m splitting constantly but no one will ever know until it’s too late and I ruin everything. I’m somehow jealous of people who are ‘sicker’ than me because at least they had the ability to throw a god damn fit about it when all I can do is sit there and look like a fucking idiot.

My current partner and FP is the “then do it” type of person who believes that talking about suicide means you’re not actually gonna do it so I can’t even tell him I wanna die when he’s not happy with me.

I could go on forever but this encapsulated most of what I feel.

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they're thinking of sending me to a psych ward and i know even then no one will care. being borderline is a miserable existence

— can i be 🎭 anon ?

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i don't know what to do anymore, i think one of my friends hate me but i keep holding on because maybe she doesn't, maybe I'm over reacting, but i can see the sworn resentment in her eyes when she sees me, i can see the way she refuses to talk to me if her life depended on it. i wish she didn't change, i wish i wasn't whatever "this" is, y'know? - 🍁

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and it hurts in every way possible

even when i'm meant to be "happy"

i always seem to worry

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