There's an ocean inside your chest

let's all go to tumblr and order the deformed erotic visage. the look on the mod's face will be an ecstatic contortion

when youre inadvertently 1% too nice to a straight guy you can usually pinpoint the exact moment where he decides you must be acting that way because you want to fuck down on him crazy style and it is at this point that one would be well advised to have a cyanide capsule under a false tooth or an equivalent fast acting response

I’ve known this post longer than I’ve known most of my friends

jeans to a brunette are sort of like armor to a knight. silks to a courtesan. chasubles to the clergy.

texting everyone in my friends list “see what happens when you disobey me?” when the eclipse starts

do me a favor and plz reblog with your five most recently used non-face, non-hand, non-heart emojis