the widening gyre

i'm rereading the murderbot diaries and murderbot's utter conviction that it and gurathin are bitter enemies is still so funny. buddy. gurathin got over this months ago. he's just a quiet guy.

one-sided antagonism is so delicious.  murderbot diaries i also very much enjoy how surreal it must be for gurathin /   to know that the heavily armed rogue secunit holds a grudge against him /  and also know that all it will ever choose to do about this is make frowny faces and flip him the bird. / (tags via space-mouse)

At some point during some media thing Shane was asked the question "Walk us through your perfect day" and he had to basically ascend to another plane of existence to say "Aha well it starts with a protein smoothie for breakfast of course--" and never ever say anything that even resembles "I wake up and Ilya Rozanov is there and he eats my ass. I take a long hot shower and Ilya Rozanov is there. I make a protein smoothie with extra spinach and then I go for a run and Ilya Rozanov is there too. I come home and Ilya Rozanov is there and we eat salad for lunch. The dressing? Well--"

Tourists in the Marvel Universe visiting New York and afterwards complaining to whoever they think the Relevant Authorities are like 'i was in New York for a WHOLE WEEK and Spider-Man didn't show up ONCE' and the relevant authorities (idk. City council?) having to issue a statement along the lines of 'we do not control the Spider-Man' (subheading: he is actually a wanted criminal)

Peter Parker (in bed recovering from the flu) (very tired) scrolling twitter like what the fuck is happening

Peter Parker's work inbox getting flooded by emails from tour companies who want to hire him as a Spider-Man consultant since his photography suggests he's really good at knowing where Spider-Man will be

*sigh* fine, fine, i'll be the new doctor who showrunner. bring me two twinks, britain's tallest woman, and 1000 pounds worth of alumininamian foil