it/its, she/him, he/her, thon/thons. more pronouns here if you wanna try em.
i am a non-binary, genderqueer woman. being non-binary does not make me less of a woman. being a woman does not make me less non-binary. being non-binary does not make me less of a human.
most images on my blog are not described. when i do write image descriptions, you have my full permission to copy and paste them, with or without credit. feedback on those image descriptions is extremely welcome.
images i create are tagged #oc and are also free to use with or without credit.
please don’t send me donation requests, especially anonymous ones.
minimal tag guide:
#img: post contains a visually still image file
#gif: post contains a visually animated image file
#vid: post contains a video file
#mp3: post contains an audio file
#flashing: post contains flashing graphics
#eye strain: post contains potentially eye-straining imagery, such as bright colors or flashing lights
#eyestrain: same meaning as #eye strain, but faster to type on desktop
#undescribed: post contains visual or audio elements, without a text transcription
#described in caption: post contains visual or audio elements, with a text transcription in the caption
#described in alt text: post contains visual elements, with a text transcription in the alt text
#blood: post contains a visual depiction of blood
#gore: post contains a visual depiction of exposed, internal organs
#ero: post contains erotic imagery, which may or may not be safe for work. this is hella subjective
#nudity: post contains a visual depiction of a person or character with chest, genitals, or buttocks exposed
#nip nudity: post contains a visual depiction of a person or character with nipples exposed, but not genitals or buttocks
go ahead and let me know if you spot a post where any of these tags are misused or missing, but note that i haven’t always had these specific guidelines in mind when using all of these tags, and they are all potentially subject to change.
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Happy Pride Month!! I decided to paint rainbow wildflowers in honor of Pride this year! I hope y'all are doing well and have a wonderful month!
And if you’re interested, this artwork is available as a high-res digital download for $3 in my shop, and as a physical print for $6. You can find those things here!
So as it turns out your sense of self doesnt exist in a vacuum. You gotta actually use it and bounce it off of other people like echolocation to see where you are as a person and shit. So if you dont regularly interact with other people the echoes just get weaker and weaker and before you know it your personality is a blurry fucked up fog clone of its former self. which it sucks because this makes it really hard to interact with people again but yknow
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The way most autism literature describes "literal interpretation" is often not at all similar to how I experience it. Teenage me even thought I couldn't be autistic because I've always been able to learn metaphors easily.
In fact, I love wordplay of all kinds. Teenage me was fascinated to learn all the types of figurative language there are in poetry and literature.
But paperwork and questionnaires are hard, because there's so much they don't state clearly. Or they don't leave room for enough nuance.
"List all the jobs you've had, with start and end dates." What if I don't remember the exact day or month? Is the year enough?
"Have you been suffering from blurred vision?" Well, if I take off my glasses the whole world is blurred, but I'm fairly sure that's not what the intake form at the optometrist is asking.
Or the infamous (and infuriatingly stereotypical) "Would you rather go to a library or a party?" What sort of party? Where? Who's there? I work at a library. Am I currently at the library for work or pleasure? Does it have a good collection?
It's not common figures of speech that confound me. It's ambiguity, in situations that aren't supposed to be ambiguous.
A quick guide for trans people who are using/ forced to use the disabled toilet due to transphobic bullshit in the UK when you wouldn’t otherwise need to do so. From a transgender wheelchair user who has given this topic a lot of thought.
Remember you are a guest in this space. I don’t know a single person who would rather you shit yourself or get assaulted than use the disabled toilet, but please remember that these toilets are built and designed for disabled people after a huge amount of campaigning and activism.
Don’t touch or move things you don’t need to. If you’re not familiar with how things work or why they are where they are just leave it be. The position of a bin might not mean anything to you but it could be really important to a wheelchair user who needs to change their tampon. Don’t touch things like grab rails either – while they’re fairly tough and you’re unlikely to cause any damage it’s not impossible and if you don’t touch it, you can’t break it.
Related, but important enough to have its own point: please don’t touch the red cord. Do not tie it up, do not wrap it around anything, don’t tuck it behind a bin. Don’t touch it (The only exception to this is to untie a cord that’s been tied up) If the cord doesn’t fall freely to the floor it could prevent a disabled person calling for help in an emergency. If you’re worried about accidentally pulling it there’s almost always at least one reset button in there with you. Press that and it cancels the alarm.
If possible allow other people waiting to go first. A lot of disabilities, both visible and less apparent, can cause problems with incontinence, urgency or pain that make it difficult for someone to wait to use the toilet. If there’s someone else in the queue and you are able to do so, offering to let them go first might really help them out.
If you want to get a radar key, get it from disability rights UK or give a small donation to a disability charity (again only if you’re able to). I’ve seen a couple of trans orgs giving away free radar keys and it’s unclear how they are being sourced. Knockoffs are common but only “real” RADAR keys are from Disability Rights UK and any profits help fund their charity work. Bear in mind that most disabled people also have to pay for these keys which are about £5. (Disability Rights UK say their keys are to be sold to disabled people or organisations only, this is a legal thing they have to say about VAT relief. There is no real way of following up how disabled someone who buys a radar key is because you don’t need to claim any benefits to be eligible for VAT relief and keys are a low value item that isn’t worth anyone looking into when things like adapted cars exist. Be gay, do crime, support disabled people having rights.)
Know the difference between a standard accessible toilet and a changing places toilet. Don’t use a changing places toilet if there is any other safe option. These have a different symbol and are bigger and fitted with extra equipment for severely disabled people and our carers. That equipment is more sensitive than anything you’ll find in a standard accessible toilet so if you do find yourself in one touch nothing. Especially don’t move the hoist (lifting equipment) as it can cause it to run out of power and make the whole space functionally useless if it’s not in the right space on the track. (To be fair this is an unlikely scenario as there aren’t that many of these toilets, but just in case)
Don’t suggest renaming accessible toilets. They’re primarily there for disabled people who can’t use an alternative, and disabled people will be looking for an accessible toilet. For most spaces you can look for an accessible toilet and have a good chance of finding a gender neutral space, but that doesn’t work the other way around. Calling it an “inclusive toilet” or “gender neutral toilet” tells me absolutely nothing about whether my wheelchair will fit.
^ great advice - especially getting to know the different kinds of access for changing places (which are rare and people plan their whole trip out round) and how we need them to stay called accessible or Disabled toilets to give anyone wanting to use the aids in them any chance of finding them or knowing what to expect.
I see so many ads for Radar keys saying they are special type or whatever on Instagram and always think jeez they must be making a large profit skimming money off disability rights uk to pay for those posts - like Echo says always buy from Disability Rights UK.
Disabled people and trans people have many struggles in common and this is great info if you only belong to the trans side.
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In light of the no.1 trending topic on this site, I'd like to inform youse that Kitty Kendall, one of the survivors who bravely spoke out against Neil Gaiman and accused him of rape in 2025, has said here and here that if you are looking to support her and other survivors, you can make a donation to OurVOICE (the counselling service Kendall herself used) or your local rape crisis centre. If you can't make a donation, you can help to ensure people do not forget what Kendall and other survivors have gone through and continue to go through as they pursue legal action, and that Gaiman has already spent a lot of money in the attempt to sue these women for speaking out.
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Do you have any recs/a reading list for BPD antipsych stuff? Likes for BPD specifically (or other pds) I just got diagnosed with “cluster B not otherwise specified” with mostly bpd traits.
hi anon! my fav piece in this general wheelhouse is Merri Lisa Johnson's "Neuroqueer Feminism: Turning With Tenderness Toward Borderline Personality Disorder" (link is to my google drive).
Some others:
Dorfman & Reynolds, The New Hysteria: BPD and Epistemic Injustice - excellent for its discussion of what the authors, following Dotson (2011), call testimonial "smothering" when it comes to patients marked as borderline.
Shaw & Proctor, Women at the Margins
Tichenor, Breedt, and Barlott, What does Borderline do? (critique of the social functions of bpd/npd/c-ptsd and their differential application across nation states, racial and gender groups, etc)
Ussher, Diagnosing difficult women and pathologising femininity: Gender bias in psychiatric nosology.
