what the hell even is this

do you ever think of the fresno nightcrawler

this year’s prom theme is… *opens envelope* Great Lakes Invasive Species And What Boaters Can Do To Stop Them

And the subject of tonight’s ecology panel is *turns on powerpoint* Enchantment Under the Sea

#if someone shouted something racialized at a food service worker and he pulled swords#if be like ‘yeah that’s fair’

And you just know that there were people who only went to that shop because Zuko was cute and obviously tragic and they could make up all sorts of RPF stories about him. So when he took the cop’s sword to immediately square off with this racist asshole, a bunch of people were hurriedly writing in notebooks. “This is 100% going in my fic. Also, I’m absolutely telling Susan.”

I am making everyone remember normal goose

Thank you @glitterdustcyclops !

ao3′s orphaning option is cool and a good idea but mostly very fucking funny. i posted this work for fun when i was younger and i still want people to be able to come back to it if they liked it, but now im an adult professional and i dont want it attached to my name. whats the word for that? umm, anonymously posting? no. i want something that indicates i murdered this story’s parents 

technically the story’s parents faked their own death and disappeared to go have an office job, and that’s even funnier

The existence of Bo Peep as a sentient nonhuman being (i.e. a "toy") in toy story really creates a lot of questions

dressing and acting like bruno mars for 8 days straight grinning and laughing dancing and twisting being all sexy and short until i pass out from dehydration/exhaustion with no prior signs of distress

im in the middle of going Girl you're amazinggg just thr way you arre and i completely ragdoll and hit my forehead full body weight on the edge of a granite coffee table

I have been considering a scenario where Garth is dead convinced Dean is gay and out and just kind of mentions it conversationally like "huh? no, I dont think Dean slept with female hunter x, I'm pretty sure he's gay" and because he is one of the people who actually met Dean and knows him ppl take his word for it. So Dean from the other side starts meeting hunters who seem convinced he's gay and when asked who told them are like "idk it's just publicly available information"

I really am tempted to write a Doctor Who fanfiction called Janitor What where the main premise is (while being a pretty major plot hole himself) another timelord who was friends with The Doctor and The Master when they were young on Gallifrey. Only, instead of running in fear or being driven completely mad when forced to stare into The Untempered Schism, he is compelled to clean time and is captive to this illusion that time doesn't have to be so wibbly or wobbly at all. He sort of works as the timelord who actually does his job. Only issue is that his two best friends have gone absolutely off their rockers and he spends most of his time cleaning up their messes. In other words, The Janitor is who patches up plotholes. How did Pete Tyler know to catch Rose in Doomsday? The Janitor. What ever happened to The Valeyard? The Janitor. How are there no Reapers before or after Father's Day? You can thank The Janitor because that's his daleks baby. And The Janitor always shows up in this shipping crate that says Fragile on the side and he's got a tool belt of bullshit like an Ultraviolet Spanner, a Gammaray Hammer, or the Sub-o-matic plunger. Of course, the even better gimmick of it all is when he lands and is asked who the hell he is. I mean it is the very last place one expects to have hired a janitor. Which always prompts a mind boggled, "Janitor? What?"

love island should introduce a "scheming eunuch" islander who is like a smart and completely asexual islander exempt from being kicked off or being made to participate in any challenges and they're just there to provide advice and be a sort of sounding board for the other islanders when they need a disinterested party to talk things through with. but the scheming eunuch has secret goals unbeknownst to anyone e.g. a cash prize for talking a certain couple into breaking up etc.