𝔅𝔦𝔱𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔰𝔴𝔢𝔢𝔱 𝔓𝔦𝔩𝔩

! WARNING ⋮ this is a jirai blog run by a mentally ill landmine system . posts can and will contain rants / vents about sensitive topics such as SA , suicidal and homocidal thoughts , SH , ED , abuse , etc . block us / dont interact if you're uncomfortable with any of this , do not report .

why do we need to beg for attention like some sort of battered shelter dog just to be noticed for once

is it so hard for any of you so called " friends " to care for us when we don't happen to be in the midst of a breakdown

why do we need to be miserable and on the verge of commiting s_icide just to feel safe

why does love come at the cost of gut wrenching pain

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we'd honestly rip out our guts as long as it meant we would get to meet anyone out there who'd be willing to reassure us , help us with our anxiety , give clear explanations of the reasons behind their behaviour , and try to help us with doing tasks by motivating us but that's too selfish to ask for

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might have to come in terms with the fact we WILL need a caretaker in the future

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back in my day we had uwu cats and alpha wolves instead of this ceo and y/n shit

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notes game for 200 posts cuz yeah

200 posts isn't even alot but we just wanted an excuse to finally make a notes game... yayy.... blue = reached , in progress green = reached , done

1 note – hi you're the first one here :3c

5 notes – drink more water

10 notes – try to study math

25 notes – make a doc for all of our headmates

30 notes – learn Russian (or at least the Cyrillic alphabet)

40 notes – start drawing more

50 notes – POST those drawings...

55 notes – no sh for a whole week

65 notes – no sh for a whole week INCLUDING other methods other than c_tting

70 notes – be more open about not being able to do certain tasks or not understanding them

80 notes – get over our crippling anxiety and join rpblr again

100 notes – post about our oc lore

not gonna add a notes limit cuz we're not allat popular + spam is allowd ,, time limit is the 26th of this month edit: holy crap I should've made these milestones harder

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I would've already killed myself years ago but if our presence makes our mother's life as terrible as she says it does then we will continue living just to spite her

she does not deserve to live a stress free life

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I hate this stupid fucking feeling of depression none of my bitchy headmates ever help me I hate this I hate this I just wanna fuck up our whole body so everyone could see I'm geniunely suffering and go be useful by finally pitying me if they aren't capable of caring for me

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crying over our mother fat shaming us but then I remember we're crying over an opinion that belongs to a literal transphobe, homophobe, ableist, etc, so it actually isn't that big of a deal

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our earphones don't work anymore and thus we haven't been able to listen to music for like . two , maybe threw weeks we're going insane

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I've been trying to find a good fanfic of mabel and jerry that isnt romantic for about ten minutes.... please vro... can i get at least a crumb of them having a father-daughter relationship.... or perhaps even a sibling-like dynamic with all their bickering..... please.........

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another song recommendation cuz yeah

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" Cowardly bewailing , Too frightened to stand tall Play the hand you have been dealt , You've got no balls at all . Drown in your blood Or live in your shit . "

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that feeling when you're one of the few alters that like posting online in the sys so now you gotta lock in and think of as many interesting things to post about and quickly publish them before someone else fronts again

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