Doodles ( ᴗ̀ ̫ᴗ́ )
YOU ARE THE REASON
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@bihexualwitch
Doodles ( ᴗ̀ ̫ᴗ́ )

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。⋆。˚ ʚïɞ ˚。⋆。
Gouache painting of my cousin’s cat Gimel, who I am catsitting this weekend and who is making biscuits on me as I type this post
Ring set with a mouse design amulet
New Kingdom, c. 1479–1425 B.C.
Gold, glazed steatite (soapstone). Inscribed with the cartouche of Thutmose III.
In the collection of The Metropolitan Museum.
Joker flavored Mountain Dew called Haha Blast
I hope when you descend to the lowest circle of hell, the ashes of your dearest loved ones staining your eyes red, that it will sting, and the pain will remind you of me before you are reduced to the nothingness of nonexistence.
Shrek flavored Sprite called Shite

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at least now we know why he has yet to return when Britain is in peril
We need a flick where King Arthur wakes in modern Jamaica and is very confused.
I think that would be so much funny. He wakes up on a remote beach in Jamaica and he only speaks/understands Brythonic and Medieval Latin. Locals assume he was a tourist who fell from a cruise ship or received a head injury and floated away from a resort. The authorities cannot match his description to any missing persons reports and his fingerprints and DNA produce no hits on INTERPOL. They suspect he may be Welsh or French because the language he speaks resembles Welsh or Breton but France and the UK both state he is not a citizen of their country. Stateless and deeply confused, he is taken in by the community near the beach where he was found, being cared for by a number of local families and doing odd jobs. He slowly learns English and adjusts to the contemporary world, uncertain if his belief that he is the legendary King Arthur was formed by whatever traumatic event caused him to end up Jamaica or if he is actually King Arthur and Prydain is in eminent peril. Mysterious letters from Morgan begin to reaffirm his belief he is King Arthur. He must choose between staying in Jamaica and continuing the happy life he has made for himself or finding a way to get back to Britain without any documentation.
ancient king white boy stuns locals by ordering in perfect Jamaican Patois
He gets to Britain and everyone expects him to sound like a posh noble Englishman because that is the picture Malory painted but he prefers to speak Welsh and when he has to speak English, he speaks with a thick Jamaican accent.
also the way he pulls britain out of said peril really pisses off the right wingers, at least in part because he recognises that he cannot do it alone and chooses those he trusts (his jamaican community) as his knights
Absolutely, Guinevere is the Jamaican nurse who took him in in this universe and many of his friends in the Jamaican community that took him in are analogous with/reincarnations of common characters from Arthurian mythology. Except for Merlin. Who is the original Merlin. Who is living a retiree lifestyle in The Bahamas for plot and wizard foresight reasons.
Unrelated side note, I love slipping in an occasional Prydain in place of Britain just to remind everyone King Arthur was not English. The landmass is Ynys Prydein to him. ☝️
(x)
strange pony

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IT'S THE WAY THEIR INTERNAL WORLDS BLEED TOGETHER. the way blitz still looks up at him, still in front of him and bathed in light, but the way they're on equal ground this time; there's no pedestal. the golden chains forcing blitz away from stolas vs them dragging blitz to him in truth seekers. stolas on his knees looking up at blitz (the moon) vs blitz on his knees watching stolas. the way that stolas has the freedom to fly after the moon vs blitz being chained down and unable to reach for him. the golden feathers. insane
"smart appliances" fuck u i want them dumb as a brick and incidentally as sturdy and enduring
jonathan sims, the shakespearean tragedy of a man that you are.
jonathan "paranoid" sims is paranoid in the same way that hamlet's a procrastinator and othello's jealous and macbeth's ambitious.
crucially, none of those characters possess even an ounce of the trait they're most commonly associated with. hamlet doesn't procrastinate, if anything everything falls apart the moment he acts without verifying the facts. and from then on, his problems stem from an impulsive tunnel vision driving him forward. othello isn't jealous, the correlation between othello and jealousy comes from iago's famous line of "beware jealousy, it is the green eyed monster." othello's fatal flaw is distrust and insecurity. macbeth doesn't have many personal ambitions, he's just very susceptible to peer pressure.
and jonathan archivist sims isn't paranoid. he wasn't paranoid for even a second of the podcast. if anything, he's naive for a large chunk of it. but since he works at Gaslighting Central, everyone around him is telling him that he's being paranoid when he worries about getting brutally murdered at the workplace; the thing that happened to his predecessor, all of her assistants, and the vast majority of his friends.
elias's "don't be so dramatic jon" and notSasha's "let's have no more of this paranoia" have become as defining for jon as iago's "green eyed monster" line became for othello.
listeners react to jonathan sims the very same way people tend to react to shakespeare's classic protagonists and I lose it ever time
this is going to have me on my hands and knees dry heaving
what the FUCK man.

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i saw these outfits on pinterest i just had to draw them
My son faces down some kind of hippo with unwaivering courage.