||Elijah|| #1 free thinker

[so horny my penis is whistling like a tea kettle] what? i cant hear you over my penis

obviously you don’t get autism because your mom took tylenol while she was pregnant with you. you get autism because your mom had sex with the president but the president was being possessed by lucifer by so oops! satan baby. then your mom befriends an angel and they go on the run together and she decides he’s going to be your father and that guy happens to have autism so you sort of absorb it through osmosis.

the motorcycle on this season of the pitt is like chekhov’s gun except every hour chekhov is showing up with two or three more guns and now you’re starting to get worried. because obviously they’re going to go off but what kind of looney tunes ass bullshit requires that many guns. chekhov’s gun has become chekhov’s militia. and there’s still like 7 hours of your shift left.

trinity santos is a study in fandom misogyny because they gave her all the characteristics fandoms usually salivate for in men, being gruff, quippy and misunderstood with a tragic backstory but a heart of gold beneath it all. they put all this into her AND let her be a lesbian. she's everything you could ever want in a character but she's not a man so half the fandom either hates her or constantly mischaracterizes her as petty, callous and aggressive while doing mental gymnastics to baby the male characters around her

Sometimes it blows my mind that there are people that don’t wear glasses/contacts. Like they can literally see with no aid. Like they wake up and just be out here seeing. What a wild concept.

And people say stuff like ‘lol don’t you hate it when you look up in the middle of the night and see a spider on your ceiling’ like bitch (!!) i could have Nicholas II last czar of Russia hangin from my ceiling fan and i would be none the wiser