the united states of moronic fucking assholes @betelgeusing - Tumblr Blog

This comment was left on a post about making the most of the Libby app. "Excessive use of generous lending policies" is the most absurd phrase I've ever seen anyone use to discuss libraries.

#she calls books “content” so it makes sense that she would feel this way

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foodffs

CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE DOUGH CHEESECAKE

Follow for recipes

Is this how you roll?

#I just took the shakiest breath

dogpuppy

#can you walk away. and give us some privacy

toddsolondz

i’m like a clown that no one hired or pays

#J MAN

lvmimis

tbh i love hear me outs but i also love the opposite of hear me outs where it’s like nearly everyone thinks they’re fuckable except you

#you can have hims

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noneofthesewillbringdisaster

She's the funniest celebrity out there

#genuinely the sydrichie dynamic is going to keep me going forever #enemies. rivals. friends. lovers. coworkers baffled by each other. any and all forms. it is like a beautiful prism to me #the bear #(also shoutout to male dana from plumbing MY 40 yr old bestie from my college job. I think about you often king)

charl0ttan

whats everyones favorite cocktails. i totally adore a sex on the beach. no rum and coke okay i want your favorite gay ass colorful fruity tasting type of drink okay? okay. i trust you. i love you

#if you were to tell me I could have anything I wanted. it would be a FROZEN prickly pear margarita with a habanero salt/raw sugar rim

herzoghead

this is frying me so bad, literally how i would feel if i had to fucking put up with herzog and kinski's evil situationship from hell

#lock me in the room with herzog and kinski and a gun with 1 bullet and I would shoot myself #just kidding I'd shoot kinski lol

moveslikekeithrichards

does anyone Actually have a good relationship with their intestines

yeah me & my intestines are cool

no my intestines are disrespectful (no diagnosis)

no my intestines are disrespectful (diagnosed condition)

some other fourth thing

Voting ended onJul 12

#my stomach and I are teammates. sworn allies even. I look at something grotesquely spicy or rich and go “I want that”#and my stomach goes “and you shall have it.” made of solid steel. I love you stomach thank you for letting me go nuts on heat and fiber etc

holocrone

WIDOW'S BAY 1.02 ⋄ Lodging

#widow's bay #my FAVORITE of the b&b games

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dailybuglebunny

Realest post fucking ever

#letterboxd mutuals will know already but the other day I watched 2 movies with the dumbest MEN serial killers I have EVER seen #just lambasting the screen the entire time ZERO mercy. they're both fucking freaks and rizzless losers lmfao I enjoyed them so much #one didn't have two brain cells to spark off each other just “sharks is god :)” and the other was a views-obsessed FLORIDA MAN #you want me to be afraid of a man from JACKSONVILLE? be serious!

hotvampireadjacent

#WHOOPS

dailyrothko

Rothko doesn't paint color he extracts pigment from liminal space to express the ephemeral nature of the universe. His "red" is acquired through the synesthesia of his Russian midlife subculture. You're not looking at a painting, you're arriving at it and advancing towards a pure aesthetic.

Now that I've said something dumb on purpose, please don't write about art like this. I think we can embrace a wide variety of even poetic ways to talk about visual mediums without insulting everyone's intelligence. Trying to conjure the right words can be an artistic endeavor of our own, but the endless fuzziness and declarative nature of what I'm seeing around the Internet is basically fucking gibberish.

#dailyrothko guy I'd go to battle for you

userfish

hey you 🫵 have you washed your water bottle lately? 🫵 it’s getting hot and mold is going to grow 🫵 wash it 🫵

#bacteria will grow everywhere your mouth has touched + every person backwashes a little it's just the nature of liquid #change out your water completely every day + wash at LEAST your mouthpiece at LEAST every other day ok? I love u

rustmarty

i hope you guys enjoy this video i made

#fffuck no you can't see my storage unit.#luv him #true detective

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caridina

if u think im pretty. splash me 💦

if u think im scary. slash me 🔪

if u think im smoky. ash me 🚬

if u think im small potatoes. mash me 🥔

cozy2000

time to post my favorite far side comic of all time

#gary larson #LMAO

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the united states of moronic fucking assholes