beast

At that exact moment my brothers both came in from playing, and all they saw was our mom unconscious on the floor and our dad slapping her. So, like, without even saying a word to each other they both just INSTANTLY start whaling on him, like, full blown attack mode to defend our mom. Which obviously didn't help the situation, but she did wake up and everything was fine.

Stump, Florp, Grime, Sludge, Slorp, Smear, Stink, Hop, Lorp, Winch.

adult elephant seal names:

In fanfiction I drop a name from canon I never referenced before and it will carry the weight that a hundred pages of set up would carry in original fiction.

Why is Zeus considered to be so important and respectable when he’s constantly cheating on his wife? Because the cheating thing isn’t ‘baseline’ canon, it’s a result of a bunch of different places in Greece wanting to have their own personal Original Character Do Not Steal And They’re Half-human Half-god!!!

Why Ares is such a prominent god in Spartan society when he’s such a clown in so many myths? Because he was one of the patron gods of Sparta (who weren’t big on the whole written literature thing), and also because Athens (who wrote down As Much As Possible) had Athena as their patron god, and Ares and Athena don’t get along (similarly to how Sparta and Athens didn’t get along). And, because they were written down so much and so frequently there, a lot of the versions of the classical myths we have access to were written down by Athenians, and they had absolutely no qualms about bashing their enemy’s fav as loudly and frequently as possible.

Why are the gods so inconsistent in their personalities and actions? Because the Greeks were getting up to all this for Hundreds Of Years, and as a result the gods got re-characterized, reorganized, combined, separated, cross bred, and literally everything that happens in old fandoms like Arthurian legend or Robin Hood. These three three mythologies/folk tales are actually a great example of what literature/story-telling back then probably looked like.

And it’s really similar to how ideas go from headcanon to fanon in modern fandom spaces. Like, in the fandom for Magic Kaito, it’s common for Kaito to be characterized as having a phobia of fish and being very fond of sweets. These are aspects of him that are based on a couple scenes that are canonical, but the extent that fandom has built them in regards to being part of his core character is not. It’s a form of collective story-telling, similar to how the whole Goncharov thing was avant garde take on collective story-telling, where the ‘story’ wasn’t the fake movie itself, but rather the experience and reactions of having seen and analyzing the movie.

when a hog steals your pants and you have to hunt it down with an ax

book of hours, use of st. omer, c. 1318-25