Cool Beans

If you're a cashier in cashier training always remember if someone's buying toilet paper you should ask them are you going to do some shitting later cuz it'll show your interested and attentive I wrote this post using text to speech on my phone

Accurate

Inaccurate when I say I’m not very political it’s because I’m not. I’m a libertarian that leans conservative but politics bore me.

The next post on this dudes blog is about how women are naturally inferior

“i’m a libertarian” right so you just a conservative that likes weed and sometimes decides not to vote

This 1️⃣ goes out to all the horny 💏 couples out there who are thinking 🤔 of getting rowdy 🔞 this 💌Valentines💮 day evening: 👍 👎DO ❌️ NOT👍 👎 If you do your child 🧒 will be born 👏 a ♏SCORPIO♏ Now, why ❓️ don’t ❌️ we like Scorpio's♏? For starters, “Scorpio” has 7️⃣ letters 🔠. 7️⃣ letters 🔠: 7️⃣ deadly ☠️ sins ✝️ 🙅‍♀ Now, what are the 7️⃣ deadly ☠️ sins? Wrath, Sloth, Gluttony, Envy 👏👏 Envy is associated with the color GREEN 💚 What else is green 💚? Marijuana. Just 1️⃣ more pothead in the world 🗺️. LAME. Now where is pot 🍲 legal? Canada 🇨🇦, Washington, Colorado, Oregon, Alaska, airplane ✈️ bathrooms if the pilot’s 👨‍✈️ chill. And where can 🥫 planes ✈️ take you? California 🕶. And what’s on California’s state flag 🚩? A BEAR 🐻. Your child 🧒. Is gay 👨‍❤️‍👨.

The execution is like slam poetry but the content is clearly a shitpost and that’s def the most powerful combination I’ve encountered in a while

I liked this post, scrolled for like another minute before I went “SHIT FUCK SHIT” and scrolled back to reblog it

AJDHNFNCKWFKSNC,JAKD;FA ALWAYS REBLOG

This mans dedication to making sure there are individual background characters

I also love how he always make the "unsure person not comfortable around cameras who can't help but quickly give a glance to the camera every two seconds" thing even though he's clearly good at acting

currently sobbing

Passing on the good feels to everyone

Dunno who needs to see this, but here you go 💛

I'm gonna get surgery to turn me into an early 2000's wizard gif

everything i have ever needed

Jorse

finally, an answer to how a horse would wear jeans

ooblek