there is literally nothing worse than accidentally eating a really soft grape

have you ever eaten a soft grape

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having one of those executive function days where everything is too many steps

This is actually a really good way of explaining this

*forgets to message back* *forgets to check notifications* *forgets to look through bookmarks* *forgets to check reminders* *forgets to check out [insert content] that i said i would* *forgets to take my phone off do not disturb* *forgets to

when your cat licks his paw…then rubs his head with the paw… wow….that’s his shmapoo and conditioner…..

*wipes dust off of laptop* spring cleaning

you’re so fucking lucky, i keep getting ads about dental implants

do you know what i think would be a fun job? author for very little kids. yes i will write about bears sharing a home together and becoming friends with the trees. maybe they make a delicious soup. there's an illustration of a sunset that takes up two pages. the babies read it and believe life is a good thing

time isn’t real and to prove it i’ll have you know ateez performed black cat nero on imm songs almost 4 months ago

blessed are those who seek the strap

he a good boy.