"you know I'm stupid for you"

Here are some more “ambiguous” phrases which courts have found DO NOT invoke your right to a lawyer:

“Maybe I should speak to my lawyer first.”

“I might like a lawyer.”

“I think I should have a lawyer present for this.”

“Could I speak to my lawyer first?”

“How long until my lawyer gets here?”

And perhaps most egregiously – “Get me a lawyer, dawg – ‘cause this is not what’s up.”

Here are the magic phrases which you need to know if you want to invoke your Miranda rights:

1) “Am I free to leave?”

It’s worth asking this even if the answer is obvious. Even if the officer does not let you leave, by forcing them to admit that you are not free to leave, you are creating a record which your attorney can use to prove that you were in custody. Miranda rights only apply if the interrogation is custodial, meaning that police officers will frequently claim that their suspects were “not in custody” to get around their Miranda rights.

2) “I am invoking my right to remain silent.”

Simply staying silent will not invoke your right to remain silent. As absurd as this is, you must explicitly say that you are invoking your right to remain silent in order to invoke that right.

3) “I am invoking my right to an attorney.”

As stated above, you must be not only clear and unambiguous, but clear and legally unambiguous. Don’t get cute. Don’t get sassy. And on the flip side, don’t get intimidated and use verbal ticks to minimize your request. Say the line with those words exactly – say it clearly, and say it once, and then say nothing else.

Because even after you’ve done all this, the police can still try to get you to talk. They’re not supposed to interrogate you, but they’re allowed to make casual conversation, and if that conversation just happens to circle back around to the thing they wanted to question you about, well, that’s really your fault for talking after you said you wouldn’t, isn’t it? Can’t possibly fault the poor officers when you initiated – if you really wanted to have your rights respected, you wouldn’t have talked to them in the first place.

The police know this, and they will mercilessly exploit this loophole. So, once you’ve successfully invoked your Miranda rights, any and all conversation you have with police officers will put those rights back into jeopardy. 

Putting it all together:

Ask: “Am I free to leave?”

If they say no, say: “I am invoking my right to remain silent and I am invoking my right to an attorney.”

And then shut up and do not say a single thing to them for any reason whatsoever until you have actually spoken to an attorney. Yes, even if it takes hours. Yes, even if they start talking to you about something else.

Finally, a very important disclaimer:

Every single cop lies. Every single cop lies and manipulates and twists the situation around to get a confession. Even when they know that the person is innocent, even when they know that what they have isn’t enough to convict someone, even when they know that that confession has been made under duress or manipulation. All they care about is getting anything to put someone behind bars.

Thank you @theleerie 😊

1. I’m a book hoarder

2. I love ancient, archaic languages, even no-longer used ones

3. I am too harsh on myself (but I don’t know how to stop)

1. My favorite band is waterparks

2. I don't like bananas

3. And im allergic to orange

okay.

i like that i can learn piano without a problem

i like how well i can do my eyeliner

i like that people find me likeable at first because i talk a lot

i like how gay i look all the time

and i like how i can be bold sometimes

1. I like my art ability

2. I like my hair

3. I like my cooking skills

4. I like my sense of humor

5. I like how weird and unique I am

No pressure on the tags:

1. I love how I can take a nap practically anywhere

2. Creating things comes easily to me

3. I have a good singing voice after years of singing my siblings to sleep

4. I like how when I garden I will talk to my plants and my garden spiders

5. I like how I can make my own jewelry and be happy with my creations

1. I love that I love to write! Being an author is my dream job, so actually enjoying to write is amazing!

2. I have a little beauty mark on my bottom lip right in the middle. It’s not very noticeable, but I love it!

3. My brown eyes are amazing! Especially in the sun.

4. I Like that I’m able to sit and read a book for hours on end

5. I like my curly hair, when it cooperates 🤪

1. I love my eyes they are the same color but don’t look the same

2. I love my curly hair, even tho sometimes I want to cut it all off

3. I love my lips even tho they always look like I’m frowning

4. I like that I’m quiet

5. I like that I find it easy to make friends

1) I like that I consider my outfits seriously because they can give out strong vibes.

2) I like that I don't care about other people's opinions for me.

3) I like my nose that is wee bit similar to mom.

4) I like that I feel comfortable with my body the way it is.

5) I like that I'm adaptable to change.

I tag you guys, do feel comfortable to play along.

☆I like the fact that I read a lot

☆I like being a creative person

☆I like being over-ambitious

☆I like my unibrow because it makes me feel unique

☆I like being sensitive and extremely perceptive of my surroundings

1. The fact that I like doing kind things for others just because

2. My obsession with reading

3. My love for foreign languages

4. My creative imagination

5. The fact that I met so many awesome people (some of which will be tagged here)

@athenassbitch @chaseisfreakingdumb @its-drspencerreid @loopyrandomfooditem

1. I like that I can do my makeup really well

2. I like that I'm a hard worker I will work for what I want

3. I like that I'm a very loving person

4. I like that I have Impeccable music taste haha

5. I like that I can pick really good friends :)

2. I like that I got a job when I believed my anxiety would prevent it me from doing it

3. I like that I'm going to graduate early

4. I like that I am organized when I wasn't for a very long time

5. I like that I'm trying each and everyday

okay.

i like that i can learn piano without a problem

i like how well i can do my eyeliner

i like that people find me likeable at first because i talk a lot

i like how gay i look all the time

and i like how i can be bold sometimes

1. I like my art ability

2. I like my hair

3. I like my cooking skills

4. I like my sense of humor

5. I like how weird and unique I am

No pressure on the tags:

1. I love how I can take a nap practically anywhere

2. Creating things comes easily to me

3. I have a good singing voice after years of singing my siblings to sleep

4. I like how when I garden I will talk to my plants and my garden spiders

5. I like how I can make my own jewelry and be happy with my creations

1. I love that I love to write! Being an author is my dream job, so actually enjoying to write is amazing!

2. I have a little beauty mark on my bottom lip right in the middle. It’s not very noticeable, but I love it!

3. My brown eyes are amazing! Especially in the sun.

4. I Like that I’m able to sit and read a book for hours on end

5. I like my curly hair, when it cooperates 🤪

1. I love my eyes they are the same color but don’t look the same

2. I love my curly hair, even tho sometimes I want to cut it all off

3. I love my lips even tho they always look like I’m frowning

4. I like that I’m quiet

5. I like that I find it easy to make friends

1) I like that I consider my outfits seriously because they can give out strong vibes.

2) I like that I don't care about other people's opinions for me.

3) I like my nose that is wee bit similar to mom.

4) I like that I feel comfortable with my body the way it is.

5) I like that I'm adaptable to change.

I tag you guys, do feel comfortable to play along.

☆I like the fact that I read a lot

☆I like being a creative person

☆I like being over-ambitious

☆I like my unibrow because it makes me feel unique

☆I like being sensitive and extremely perceptive of my surroundings

1. The fact that I like doing kind things for others just because

2. My obsession with reading

3. My love for foreign languages

4. My creative imagination

5. The fact that I met so many awesome people (some of which will be tagged here)

@athenassbitch @chaseisfreakingdumb @its-drspencerreid @loopyrandomfooditem

1. I like that I can do my makeup really well

2. I like that I'm a hard worker I will work for what I want

3. I like that I'm a very loving person

4. I like that I have Impeccable music taste haha

5. I like that I can pick really good friends :)

We love coming up with new features to make your experience on Tumblr more visceral; when they don’t work out that way, we remove them to make space for new features. Unfortunately, group chats haven’t lived up to our expectations, so we’ll be removing them from Tumblr this month.

Some of you have really leaned into group chats, discussing the merits of various sourdough proofing times, sharing your WIPs with new audiences, and exchanging complicated fan theories on the provenance of Croki.

"No, we aren't! I tried to kill you four times!"