Stop acting like a disgruntled pelican

At the end of the day, you can’t delay joy until life looks a certain way. You deserve to enjoy your life now.

now that the world cup is out of the way can we focus on me instead

yeah it's all by choice and not because i have issues with intimacy and vulnerability and abandonment and relationships and my body and my parents and my childhood and how much i value myself and how im perceived and

fuck y’all if you laid up with your lil boo rn i hope the ceiling fan fall on y'all

Electricians are warning young couples not to spoon, be "laid up" within 4 feet of a ceiling fan this holiday season

just ate an orange… no scurvy for me thank you… #NoScurvy

it's always "you gnawed off your own leg to escape like an animal caught in a trap" and never "why didn't anyone try to help you out of the trap" or "why weren't you provided with any other resources to escape the trap with except for your own teeth"

I think Joan of Arc's fursona would be a dog called Joan of Bark, but my partner thinks it would be a phoenix, which seems insensitive to me, but neither of us are furries, so I guess we don't really get a say either way.

*taking notes* What else do you know about this beautiful world?

I've been horny. Obviously just in my abstract ways

When I was a kid watching tv was idiot coded and nerds read books, but now scrolling shortform videos is considered braindead behavior and watching tv means you're some kinda intellectual. You might think this shifting assessment of media's consumers might make readers into absolute super geniuses, but no. Only perverts read now.

think it's a deep consolation to know that spiders dream, that monkeys tease predators, that dolphins have accents, that lions can be scared silly by a lone mongoose, that otters hold hands, and ants bury their dead. that there isn't their life and our life. nor your life and my life. that it's just one teetering and endless thread and all of us, all of us, are entangled w it as deep as entanglement goes. v neat i think.

i say yay outloud too like this isn't just my internet persona this is real me