this is a dick grayson defense account💖

"Diversity of opinion" but the opinions are "We should use a chainsaw to rescue a cat from a tree" and "We should trap more cats on the tree and then set it on fire"

To clarify: If those are your only options (and they often are) it's your moral imperative to choose the chainsaw.

Fuck this rhetoric. You are not obligated to choose the chainsaw. Go create a better solution.

It is true in my heart of hearts that everyone. or at least a solid majority of people. genuinely think the inciting incident of the HuntervHollander fight is that Scott called Shane a slur. I’m being serious. There is very little that could get Hockey’s Two Goodest Boys beating each other up especially with the genuine rage Shane was displaying there. A week after the fight Shane and Scott’s agents have to force them to separately release statements that are just “I did not say something racist to one of the only Asian players in the league” and “I did not try to kill Scott because he said a racist slur to me” because the hockey community is tearing them to SHREDS absolutely convinced Scott said some heinous shit to get Shane to react like that. Which. He did. But it was a gay-on-gay hate crime and nobody was guessing that.

That being said, the public reaction also gets flipped a complete 180 after Scott comes out. The new prevailing theory is that Scott hinted at being gay and Shane immediately tried to do a homophobia about it. Suddenly Shane is getting canceled over alleged homophobia. This would be the funniest thing to ever happen to Ilya if Shane wasn’t freaking out to him about being associated with the concept of being gay even in a homophobic way. Scott and Shane have to release ANOTHER pair of statements which are “I was not trying to commit a hate crime, I did not know Scott was gay at this point in time” and “I did not tell Hollander I was gay to instigate a fight”. Once again, only some people believe them.

Hollanov comes out and Scott’s public response is to tweet a clip of their fight and an “I’ve known for a while”. it is ONLY at this point that people start putting together what actually fucking happened that one time five years ago Hollander randomly tried to kill Hunter “unprovoked”. And obviously Ilya fighting for his man’s life in the comments is what confirms everything.

It is true in my heart of hearts that everyone. or at least a solid majority of people. genuinely think the inciting incident of the HuntervHollander fight is that Scott called Shane a slur. I’m being serious. There is very little that could get Hockey’s Two Goodest Boys beating each other up especially with the genuine rage Shane was displaying there. A week after the fight Shane and Scott’s agents have to force them to separately release statements that are just “I did not say something racist to one of the only Asian players in the league” and “I did not try to kill Scott because he said a racist slur to me” because the hockey community is tearing them to SHREDS absolutely convinced Scott said some heinous shit to get Shane to react like that. Which. He did. But it was a gay-on-gay hate crime and nobody was guessing that.

ilya hanging out with The GuysTM and they get a little drunk and start talking about girls and sex and they make a game out of who has done the craziest thing in the bedroom and the guys say stuff like in high school i fucked my gf while her dad was home and yeah jessie wanted to tie me up the other day and ilya will say things like one time shane couldn’t sleep so i edged him the whole night and then made him cum so hard he passed out and slept for seven hours and shane bought this book with 100 different sex positions and we tried them all over three days and he made a spreadsheet and the guys just pat him on the back like sure roz, keep telling yourself that, there’s no way hollander wants anything but regular missionary for 8 minutes and no matter what ilya says they never believe him

cliff voice: hollzyyyy happy Birthday big dog!!! the strippers i got ya should be on their way! Ha Ha just kidding buddy i didn't order any strippers, don't worry. they're called exotic dancers now. I'm joking Buddy I'm joking. they should be there in an hour though. Roz didn't tell ya? Nah I'm just messing with you man haha take it easy. make sure you have cash on you though *hangs up*

i think carter vaughn is the type of guy who always has a new thing going on and you can literally never predict what it is. he's knitting. he's woodworking. he started rock climbing. he stopped rock climbing and he has a really funny story about why but you aren't allowed to tell team management. he's into crypto. he's playing runescape. he's doing it all

the notion of shane as "team mom" of the centaurs is obviously problematic in many ways but most importantly shane has never gone out of his way to give a shit about a teammate in his life. he's the main character and the rest of his team are Also There