Living with a chronic illness means never having enough energy to get through all the basic, practical tasks you have to do in a day. Which means that every day there are more and more tasks which didn't get done and have to be carried over to the next day. Eventually the list becomes so long that you have to accept that many of the things on it will never get done, and you end up living with a kind of graveyard of undone tasks which you go through life trying to ignore because you're just not able to do anything about them.
Yes. Ugh, and the guilt whenever you want to do anything for fun, because the tasks piling up really are essential and important, but you will go insane if your life is 100% illness and drudgery. The judgment of others who see you're not handling the basics of "adulting," who don't understand or believe that you are working as hard as you possibly can. The self-doubt about whether you really could be doing more. Feeling just a little gross and dirty all the time because you can't quite keep up, until it feels like a moral failing rather than a practical one - that you're not a struggling person, you're a gross person.
Hate it hate it hate it.



















