fuck it we ball

knowing when to hold em and when to fold em is also important for origami

honestly really funny how many times john green has said 'i'm never signing every copy of the first printing of one of my books again' and then several years later he releases another book and what does he do? sign every copy of the first printing.

Rattling the bars of my cage but you can tell my heart's not in it and I try to discreetly look down check my phone several times

i swear if the wizard doesnt let me out of his abandoned salt mine soon im gonna fucking LOSE IT

what did you do to be put into the salt mine

i MAY have eaten his special wizard meal. but i think he should let me out tbh

was it good? was it worth it? are you able to bear the weight of your sin?

im not gonna lie it was fucking delicious i would fucking do it again. wait shit youre the fucking wizard in disguise seeing if ive learned my lesson arent you. fuck.

10 YEARS IN THE ABANDONED SALT MINE.

it’s amazing how women are able to navigate crowded rooms without ever touching a palm to a man’s lower back

sometimes you just have to say "you are all so fucking stupid" and scroll past

do people just not find those AI pop-ups everywhere not incredibly patronizing: "help me write" "help me visualize" help me put my balls in your mouth