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All he feels is fire. It feels like his entire body is being sucked down out of his hole, all the pressure in the world being concentrated in that tender spot. He can feel her head inside him, feel his body squeeeeze with all its might as she lowers through his pelvis. He can hear some fluid plop into the water past his own inhuman grunting, and he needs to breathe. He knows he needs to breathe but he can't stop it. The urge to push is so strong, it's overpowering him completely.

Then, quicker than ever comes the burning. That intense, all-encompassing fire as his baby's hard skull lowers and widens his tissue. Why do all of their babies have such big fucking heads?

He tries not to scream, but he just can't stop it. It's completely beyond his control as he leans more over his lap, gripping the toilet for dear life, knees coming up higher and feet off the floor, teeth bared and his eyes finally scrunching shut.

"OOOOOOUUUUUUUIT'URTSSOOBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDD!!"

"Breathe, love!" James is saying. "Breathe."

But River can't! His body is locked in, locked down, he's pushing with every fucking muscle he has, feeling that huge head push just behind his tissue. He's going to fucking push her out into the toilet!

"SHE'SCOMING--OUT I'M PUSHINGHEROOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!!"

But it stops. Eventually, it has to. River is properly panting, burning and trembling everywhere. He widens his legs, puts a hand down there to feel. Her head is right there, already peeking out past his slit.

"Do you want to go on your hands and knees?" James asks him, taking his arm and supporting his trembling weight.

River just keeps panting and feeling, then wipes the blood on his fingers on his thigh. "I dunno. I dunno, I just need her out. I can't do it... I can't."

"Of course you can," James insists. "You're already doing it, baby, her head's right there."

Sooner than expected, he feels the urge again. He grips for James's sleeve with his bloody fingers, panting hard as his belly contracts inward.

"She's coming, she's coming," River pants, feeling himself start to bear down, feeling his muscles contract and open around her hard head. He needs to get upright.

James is only supporting half his weight and River is barely off the toilet seat, still standing with his knees bent low, but there's no time. He needs to push now. He's still grunting, trying not to panic, and he grips the back of James's shirt and his own thigh as his body locks in, belly going taut against him and all his muscles stiffening, and he gives a huge push down, dipping lower and stiffer.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRR" The grunt is guttural and wet, involuntary, as he bears down as hard and long as he can. Her head is a bowling ball in his pelvis, dropped low and stretching his tissue like hell. It feels like it's stretched to its limit, but he knows there's so much more to go. The pressure is intense. It's impossible to stop, and it feels like he's going to split in half if he keeps going. There's only one way out of this. He thinks he can get her head out on this one if he just pushes really, really hard.

He raises just a little as the push ebbs away, James scrambling to fix his grip on him -- he must be heavy -- but then he gears up to go right back. Reaches back to pull the bottom of his ass cheek open in the vain hope that it'll help make room for her head. He can feel his entire body shaking, his stiff legs especially, spread as wide open as he can get them. He's having trouble getting a grip with his foot on the floor.

With a hard and guttural involuntary "EUH---", River focuses all of his power on pushing down on that burning bowling ball. He starts to tip his head back as he bares his teeth, trembling with the force, still holding himself open and squatting a little deeper into the pressure as if that'll help pop her head out. He hears James's voice, but not the words. He knows he's not going to get her head out when he starts to feel that red hot desperation for air. Just a little more though, he can feel her slipping down, moving on out on her own, making his body keep hold of the push...

But right when he feels her move, he can't hold it anymore. His held air bursts out of him with a "DAH!" and he has no idea how long he held it.

James had bent his knees a little bit to keep them both upright. He's gripping River fiercely, trembling himself as River hears him saying, "Amazing, baby, you're right there."

River uses his hand behind himself to feel his perineum. He's stretched open, her heavy head peeking out. It bobs up and down just a little as he pants. He can feel her moving and dropping. She wants to come out. It's impossible to hold that pressure and burning. He can't wait. He needs to push her out.

With another guttural grunt, his body makes the choice for him. He feels his belly squeeze her down, and he leans down into it, lowering his pelvis a bit more so he's more or less sitting in the air, his stiff arm holding the underside of his thigh now, just near her descending head.

He hears himself grunt, tight and unrecognizable, "She'scom...."

He hears James encouraging him to push. Just a little more.

His grunt escapes into a guttural strain, and he feels himself bend down more. The pressure is insane. His face is burning, his body completely covered in sweat. It's dripping down his neck, the sides of his big hard belly, his thighs, his ankles.

He widens his legs more at the end of this push as far as they can go, legs trembling, putting a little more into it, as much as he possibly can for the final oompf, and his trembly strangled grunt bursts out of his teeth, "DHHR!!"

He can feel the burn as his stretched tissue bounces back up, her head hiding back. But with a quick feel, he can tell she's almost there.

"Come on, baby," he pants. "Come on, you can do it."

James helps him to his knees on a towel on the floor. He rushes around him, grabbing more towels, River thinks. He doesn't pay attention. He's too busy breathing, breathing, breathing. Just blowing air into that horrible burning and pressure, trying to keep open, trying not to clamp down on her head and suck her back inside.

"That's so good, Riv, keep doing it just like that," he hears James say eventually.

Between pressurized blows of air, River asks, "Howmuchisout?"

"Top of her head. She's coming in and out, you're gonna push her head out on the next

one, okay?"

"I'm trying... I'm trying."

"You will. You're doing it perfectly, babe, you just focus now."

He could feel her hard head going back in, taking away some of that intense burning. But then it hits him again, hard as hell. He can't hold on anymore. He has to just surrender, just let go. To hell with being scared of tearing. It's going to happen. He can't stop the urge.

He doesn't even have time to warn James, who's on his feet and running the tap, before he plants his palms on the tile floor and opens his legs as wide as he can with a massive, guttural grunt.

It's so powerful, he can't close his mouth. His belly touches the towel on the floor as he leans back and down, pushing his bottom into the floor with all the pressure in the world.

Holy fuck, the burning. It's opening, he knows, because he feels like he's going to rip wide open.

James is saying something, probably encouragement, but River can't hear the words. He just grunts, tipping his face closer to the floor, feeling like his face is going to fucking explode with all the pressure packed into it. No doubt he's red as a beet.

"UUUHHHHHHHH," he grunts it out, but she wants out right now. He can feel her squirm and turn inside him, helping him but oh, the pain is horrible. He puts his hand over her emerging head as he leans back and bears down again, grunting tight and loud, "SHE'S CROWNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGUUURRRRGGGGGGGHHH...."

"She is, you've got it, one more."

River shoves down again, determined to push her whole head out on this one. His baby is almost out. It's almost over. He just needs to put in this last bit of effort for her, just needs to be strong.

He gives his baby back-to-back pushes, not even sure if he's still having a contraction anymore. It all hurts like hellfire and he needs her out NOW. His hand is still holding her scalp, so he feels every hard shove as he puts absolutely everything he has into pushing her out, using every muscle in his body and opening, opening, opening.

He can feel James's hands around her crown, can feel a warm towel he has pressed there, and he braces himself for each hard push, bearing down down down into that warm pressure, into his husband's hands. James has them both. It's just them. He can fully let go, can trust James completely.

Push, push, push, River barely makes a sound. Or maybe he does but he can't hear himself anymore. He just clenches down and feels that big hard head stretching him more more, a little more each time. He's locked in. This is it. This is the last of it, and she needs his effort now.

He hears James tell him that he's at her eyes. River is fully primal, straining down so hard as his whole body trembles. He can't give her the chance to suck back in, not now. He has to push her through that threshold. All other thoughts besides PUSH leave his mind as he bears down as hard as he possibly can with singleminded focus, concentrating fully on the burn and stretch as he feels his tissues peel back over her nose.

One more breath in, opening his legs as wide as they can go, his hand feeling the globe of her head, her wet hair, and he shoves back into James's hands completely silent.

He feels her head pop out almost instantly, the quickest sharpest burn, and there's the relief. Fluid is dripping to the towel, down River's arm as he's still holding her head. Panting and shouting, River feels her head before he needs to put both hands on the floor and brace himself. He's still contracting, harder this time. It's the last bit of strength, the final push, the final stretch. He's leaving blood on the floor under his hand. He can hear James sobbing and sniffling with joy and anxiety. For him, for their girl, River has to make this count.

Mouth wide open, River roars with all his God-given strength, giving their baby the hardest push of his life. His mind detaches from his body as he feels her shoulder pop down and stretch him open.

He can see himself as if he's looking at someone else, on his knees on the floor, spread wide open, his t-shirt rucked up over his muscular back as he spreads his arms out and holds them open across the floor, his chin practically on the tiles and his face completely red and shiny as he makes an inhuman sound through his clenched teeth. And his baby's head fully out, James's hands holding beneath her so gently. Her neck is out, the rest of her coming slowly and steadily with River's strength. James doesn't pull at all. She comes out with River's final push alone.

Her body is soft and wiggly. With that final brutal push, she shoots out into James's hands and the towel he holds. River releases his air and his strength in a loud, breathy grunt. His body wants to collapse, but he has to make sure she's okay. He has to hear her cry.

"James," he pants, "Oh, oh, oh God!"

"She's okay, Riv, she's trying to cry!"

River tries to turn, and James helps him. He sits up, his back against James's chest, as James passes him their baby through his legs. James helps him lift up his t-shirt, now soiled, so their baby can feel his skin.

There she is. She's pink, her hair as wet and dark as her siblings. She's shrieking, her gummy mouth wide open. The shape of her head is practically round, not coned.

"That was so fast," River cries. "Fuck, I thought I was going to die!" He properly sobs then, and James kisses him, crying himself. Together they cradle their daughter against his chest.

"You did it on your own," James says against his face. "I knew you could. My God, Riv, your strength. You are no-nonsense."

Evan Buckley had always wanted a family of his own, so when the pregnancy test came back positive that rainy afternoon, he was delighted.

Of course pregnancy hadn’t been easy by any means. He was put on strict desk duty throughout his pregnancy and finally went on parental leave at 38 weeks.

That was exactly 2 weeks and 3 days ago. In that time, he had made so many loaves of bread, he had decided to sell them locally to make some extra cash.

But today, he felt off. He had awoken much earlier than usual. At 6 am he was wide awake, glaring at a snoring Eddie.

Deciding to let Eddie sleep and not deal with Buck flopping around, he had made his way into the living room.

For about an hour he was content to just chill on the couch, idly catching up on messages and half listening to the news.

But what he assumed were braxton hicks seemed to be getting stronger and stronger with each one.

“Let’s call your auntie Hen-“ he mused lightly to his bump, running a hand over the swell as the baby gave a little kick,

“Hello?” Hen’s groggy voice came up as Buck slowly stood.

“Hey Hen uhh.. can I ask you something?” Buck asked, feeling a bit sheepish as he started to pace.

“Yeah sure. Are you okay? Is bean okay?” Hen asked, now more awake. Voice laced with concern.

“Uhh yeah, I’m just feeling a lot of.. cramps I guess- I’m not—“ Buck paused, a little caught off guard at the sudden vice grip in his low sitting middle. Fumbling to grab onto the mantle, trying to widen his stance.

Blinking rapidly, he watched as the crotch of his pants became wet.

“Oh.” He breathed out.

“Buck? Buck? What’s wrong?” Hen’s voice broke him out of his haze.

“I uh— I’ll call you back Hen, I gotta tell Eddie something-“ Buck explained.

“Tell me what?” Eddie’s drowsy voice sounded from the hallway as Buck hung up the call.

Buck turned to the other firefighter, gripping sheepishly.

“Buck?” Eddie asked, “are you okay?” He asked.

“Umm.. yeah-“ Buck nodded slowly. “My.. my waters just uh- broke.” Buck explained, motioning to the wet spot on his pants.

It took a few moments for Eddie to process the information, staring blankly at his boyfriend.

“We’re gonna have a baby.. today-“ Eddie whispered.

“Yeah, yeah- we are.” Buck nodded, not being able to help but grin.

“Okay- okay.” Eddie nodded, trying his hardest not to panic.

“Hey hey-“ Buck immediately took the others' hands into his own.

“We got this Eddie-“ Buck reassured as Eddie’s hand cradled the others baby bump.

“I sure hope so-“ Eddie mumbled, kissing Buck on the cheek.

“I’m positive.” Buck hummed.

-

The midwife had warned Buck’s labor might progress slowly due to the fact that this was his first birth. But things seemed to be quite the opposite.

By early afternoon, he was in transition stage. Leaning up against the bed frame, Eddie wipes his sweaty face, muttering soft encouragement into his ear.

“I’m going to check you again, okay mister Buckley?” The midwife spoke, grabbing a pair of gloves.

“It’s just Buck-“ Buck responded, giving a small nod.

“Alright Buck, you’ll feel a bit of pressure like before okay?” She spoke as he nodded, feeling the contraction wane off.

She had carefully checked, eyes widening in surprise.

“It seems as baby is excited to meet you two. Fully dilated and I can already feel a head against my fingers.” She explained, hurriedly standing to grab a few extra pads to sit beneath the laboring male.

“Ya hear that Buck?” Eddie muttered, rubbing the others back.

“Yeah-“ Buck mumbled, trying to smile despite how much pain he was in.

“Okay Buck, you can push whenever you have your next contraction, or if you want to wait a bit and just let the baby move down naturally, that’s alright too.” The midwife explained.

Buck nodded, shifting slowly so his back was against Eddie’s chest, slowly lowering himself into a squat.

He found himself groaning as the next contraction peaked, chin tucked into his chest.

Buck wasn’t sure how much time had passed until he felt the unmistakable burn between his legs. Gasping and shifting his stance, gripping harder onto Eddie.

“Easy easy-“ Eddie muttered, placing a kiss on his cheek.

“Just breathe the head out Buck-“ the midwife spoke softly as she applied a bit of counter pressure so he wouldn’t tear.

“It really hurts!” He found himself whimpering.

“I know baby, you’re almost finished.” Eddie soothed, giving his hand a soft squeeze.

“Ah-!” Buck gasped, hips jerking slightly as the head came free.

The next few moments were a blur for Buck, suddenly the pain was gone and he had something placed on his chest.

He had wrapped his trembling arms around his squalling son, grateful as Eddie helped him sit down.

“Hey.. hey there—“ Buck’s voice broke as he finally looked down at his son.

“Hey bean-“ He laughed, leaning back into Eddie.

“Good job!” The midwife praised, having grabbed a towel to place over the baby.

Eddie was staring silently at the squirmy baby that was beginning to settle into Buck’s warmth with little whimpers.

“Oh.. oh..” Eddie breathed out, letting the baby grasp his finger.

“Hey bean..” Eddie whispered, scared if he spoke any louder the peaceful moment would shatter.

“I’m your papa..” Eddie spoke, his voice breaking.

“Yeah, he’s the one that gave ya the big head-“ Buck joked weakly.

Eddie rolled his eyes, leaning down to capture Buck’s lips in a tender kiss.

“I love you. Both of you.” Eddie spoke.