[playing:] » i was all over her - salvia palth «
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Peaceful. That was how he would have described the night; and that was all he wanted. Everything was quiet, except for the whisper of the wind in the trees; the dark sky was beautiful, clear and full of small stars - he could not distinguish them through his blurry vision, but he still knew they were there.
The body he was tenderly holding in his arms was softly breathing. He relished in the feeling of his arms wrapped around him, of the boy's head against his chest; of the warmth, the calm. It was almost enough to make him forget the paralyzing pain sowed in his stomach, blooming through his body.
He closed his eyes, and the night wrapped around him; and he was part of the world. And everything was okay.
Surprised, Red opened back his eyes and glanced at Hope; the young man was awake, his blank gaze staring into the void.
"Chase? Is that you?" he repeated, audibly anxious now.
Red could feel him getting agitated in his arms; he looked up to the blurry stars, and took a deep breath.
"...Yeah, it's me," he lied.
The boy stopped trembling, and breathed a weak sigh of relief. Red gazed at his face. His blood-stained hair stuck to his forehead; putting in considerable effort to ignore the throbbing pain that shot through his every movement, Red gently pulled the dirty locks away from his face. He watched him for a few seconds, and saw his lips open again before he heard the soft whisper.
Red stayed silent, as he felt his heart break inside his chest.
The person who should’ve been receiving those words would never hear them. And him, a fraud, a monster, he was stealing them. Even worse - shame on him, he rejoiced in them. Had he ever even dared to imagine Hope whispering those words to him? If only he had known in what circumstances his wish would come true… he almost laughed, as tears filled his eyes. He took another deep breath, to try and prevent his voice from trembling when he answered.
It did not work; but Hope didn't seem to care. Red softly tightened his grip around the boy’s body. He could feel his irregular breathing ; and the wet stream under his hands, beating to the rhythm of his heart ; and life, slowly escaping through his fingers. And he held him even tighter.
"Was... was I good?" Hope whispered, a little quieter this time.
Red could not fight it anymore; he let the tears escape his eyes.
"...Yes, you were great." His voice broke when he added, "You can rest now."
Giving up on trying to hold back the soft sobs rising in his throat, Red closed his eyes. But a terrifyingly painful thought made him open them again; he wanted to see Hope alive again. One last time.
His gaze fell on the boy's face. He was slowly closing his eyes, and mumbled, almost inaudibly.
He was just sleeping; the memories of his face contorted in a scream of agony were far away when he looked so serene. And that’s how he would always be, now.
Red tightened his grip once more; he needed to feel the boy breathe again. One last time.
It was so simple, so easy. He had finally escaped. And he was at peace now. Nothing could hurt him anymore; forever.
“War is over”, Red whispered as he closed his eyes. It would be his turn soon enough. And with a little luck, he would have time to glance at him in heaven as he’d make his way down to hell. Maybe even see his smile again.
The pain was slowly fading away. Hope’s face lingered in his mind. A peaceful face, asleep, no blood, no bruises. The fresh air and pine scent. The whisper of the wind. The blurry stars. One last breath.
hope this gives everyone who reads it depression because it sure made me depressed to write it who wants a xanax
blakekathryn
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