Some Kine of Animal

I believe in a lot of things. I believe that all people are innately good. I believe that humans are all beautiful, given they try. I believe that this very sun will peek over the horizon today, tomorrow, always. I believe that all things in nature are beautiful.

The most important is the faith I indoctrinate my life with. Attuning to this faith, I believe it is my responsibility to go and serve for 2 years. This is what I have been preparing myself for the past 8 months and the time is coming.

I believe that there are no goodbyes that suffice forever. People, places, things are not just ripped from us for always. They remain with us and are reinforced and strengthened within us every time we reunite. Our experiences are stricken in the record of our lives like the distinct tattooing of wrinkles on our minds. Experience is permanent, we don't forget everything. Your mind might not remember, but your behavior, your inhibitions, your mental process is altered by life for good. From the molecules passing into your body through your lungs, to the people you may or may not meet.

This permanence is why I am horrible at goodbyes. I will never accept the loss of someone forever. I mourn after people, things, places. But they are never gone from the essence of my existence. It is what I believe.

At a last, whoever is reading this, you must know that I love you. You have great potential to do all things good, and for this I will always have that love. There is nothing you can do that can excuse me of this love I require of myself. Do not mistake my disagreement of belief for hatred or even moderate dislike. We are the only life we know of a surety, making love a necessity. This is what I believe.

I've always said to myself that I love where I live because of the seasonal change. Whenever I get sick of one season, another rolls around to erase the annoyance of the former. I my favorite season was always the one after the one we were currently in. My mind used that logic to propel me through what I innately felt, but never realized to myself, was going to be another few months of horrible weather.

Young as I was, being surrounded with the unyielding evil influence of my high school years, I took the world as a shallow and dreary place. All entities promised laurels to please us out of our first hesitant steps only to hurt us as soon as confidence is built. Happiness was mutely lingering in the misery that we knew and clinging to it with our very life.

The inherent wrongness of that view of the world is freeing in some sense of the word. Going along as if no happiness is worth changing present circumstances is just stupid. Especially when you read it, see it, comprehend it, and tell yourself that the guy writing this is bluntly point out the obvious.

But...hang on, would you willingly go through a hard change if you thought you'd be better off on the other side? "Better off" being subject to definition, the prospect of hardship, no matter the end, is hard to accept. Even a little bit.

On the other side of this beautiful, snow- and tree-covered mountain, the Waldo Canyon burned for weeks. The smoke took so many forms, it was like watching a genius cloud-doppelganger. Fear was companion to the heaviness of heart. The burn scar rules mountains. So much loss, not only of wilderness but of the homes of people, brothers and sisters, was enough to make me tear up.

Despite the great loss, the destruction, we learn that fires are another part of the ever-changing nature of this world. This horrible sequence of events is necessary for the ecosystem to move forward. When the slate is cleared, things can progress. From the Waldo Canyon fire, I learned that destruction, loss, things taken away: these are the catalysts of change. For the better.

My strongest enemy,

My closest friend,

My greatest ally,

My continuing conquest.

The stairs that remind of responsibility.

Remind me who I am,

What I am made of,

Why I am made.

Half way up, they tell me:

Don’t Stop

In the moments where it’s hardest,

It doesn’t matter how far you’ve come,

It doesn’t matter how far you have yet.

So i'm watching this debate, right? I absolutely despise politics because i hate all politicians. But the drama of this debate is worthy even of the E! network.

Now i don't wanna be like one of your facebook friends who puts up their offensively extreme ideas on your news feed all day, but i can do what i want and i feel like i'm unbiased in my craziness.

Here's what it's looking like right now: Romney is honestly tearing Obama up like i tear open my dad's homemade enchiladas. The only thing holding Obama up right now is Romney's own crazy ideas. He doesn't have a plan that i don't understand and i feel like nobody will understand because its so rich person complex. Ultimately, it comes down to both of them are either incompetent or aren't really concerned with letting us know what their plans are.

One thing i've been thinking the past few days is why do i need to choose between the lesser of 2 evils? Why are there 2 evils at all? I'm not voting because i don't think either of these guys are gonna lead us anywhere positive. But i'm not here to talk about my treasonous thoughts.

The last thing that's been bugging me is that the very men who are "pleading" the cases of the middle class are so far above the middle class, the question is begged: how do they even care about what happens to the middle class? Why are we being ruled by the rich elite? Last time i checked, you can't represent someone who isn't similar to you. That's the nature of the word, isn't it? When you "represent" someone, you should have something in common with them.