Just an absolute mess @apostatoes - Tumblr Blog

When there’s a CEO in an Ace Attorney case

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doubleca5t

I mean on the one hand, yes, shipping spongebob characters is certifiably absurd and people who do it do not deserve rights but on the OTHER hand if you took Spongebob and Squidward's personalities and dropped them into, say, a pair of anime girls from a gacha game or two white guys from a teen drama everyone would be like "oh of COURSE this is a big ship"

doubleca5t

glad to see everyone reading this post is just as upset as I was when I thought of it

dead-in-a-sears-parking-lot

Someone who hasn’t watch Star Trek, please explain this picture

gamtosthegreat

everyone’s hallucinating. Red guy is having a baby, yellow guy is doing a sick air guitar solo, blue guy is getting shot in slow motion and beige guy just got out of an imaginary divorce.

insomniparty

beige guy just kicked EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THE WIGGLES IN THE BALLS and is standing in the middle of the carnage, contemplating life

roomba-with-knives-taped-to-it

Period cramp simulator on three cis dudes and one trans man

randomslasher

last comment wins

gotitforcheap-deactivated201611

online millennial: did you see that clapback McDonald did on twitter today?

other online millennial: yes, it was cool

both online millennial, in unison: today we will eat at McDonald

whitepeopletwitter

kalesrebellion

So funny story actually. One of my friends was hooking up with this girl, they were friends with benefits. She needed a date for some work party so he agreed to go with her. Turns out her dad owns like 3 dental practices and she worked as the business manager for one of them.

Anyway my friend had some not so nice teeth and during dinner the father of his fwb was like “you work where you work, you sleep with him and his teeth look like that? Get him an appointment.”and then bounced. So his fwb made him an appointment at the practice she managed and my friend ended up needing like 3k worth of dental work and his friend with benefits just gave it to him for free.

So that is the story of how my friend not only got sex, but dental out of the friends with benefits deal.

helloitsbees

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theconcealedweapon

durkin77

Like I get that it’s a dick move if it’s not necessary. But if you break down in tears because you have to actually go to work you’re a massive fucking pussy.

creation-of-pokerus

It’s more like they were given a brief, happier, healthier alternative to being stuck inside a small space for 8 hours a day for a year and a half and going back to that is realizing how awful it really is.

all-hail-trudos

Calling someone a “pussy” for breaking down in tears over being subjected to fresh, unreasonable misery is contributing to the problem of letting corporations dictate our lives and sounds a lot like deep throating the boot. (Aside from the casual misogyny of saying tears, Feeling Things, and apparently not wanting to go to work are feminine and not something a manly man would do).

Dude literally had a year of freedom. He could go outside, go to the park, stay home, just generally go where he pleased. Like a fucking adult who understood he had work to do, and obviously still got it all done because he hasn’t been fired or “laid off”. Now he’s got a collar back on his neck and a chain keeping him at a desk between a set of beige walls and an equally boring ceiling, which was there before, but now he sees it for what it is. And why is it there? Because his boss has a deep insecurity about letting people work without oversight. Because his manager starts to look a little redundant if people can do their jobs without touching base, attending meetings, and generally doing stuff that makes said manager look like a Leader. Because there’s people who think “this is the way my parents did it, and their parents did it, and presumably (but actually not) how their parents did it, so it’s good enough for me and you, and let’s have no more talk of this change nonsense”.

This is why there’s talk of a literal Great Resignation coming, as people who’ve come to appreciate their freedom give the bird to unreasonable bosses who want them back in an office. And other people who actually preferred the structure and routine of the desk look for another one when their own bosses decide to keep the work-from-home model coming. Covid has caused a cultural shift, and ridiculing our fellow man for wanting something better is the stupidest thing you can do.

bogleech

The whole year proved that people still get enough work done without going in person and we know all that commuting is hell on the environment. There actually ought to be a push to “ban” physical office work; absolutely no business should be able to force you to go somewhere if your work can be done from anywhere at all.

I say this as someone who has never had an office/cubicle job myself, but holy shit the notes are an absolute trainwreck of people thinking office workers have “cushy” jobs they should appreciate better. No, no they do not, office workers have a high suicide rate for a reason. More to the point, you shouldn’t be making any worker’s rights into a “who has it worse” race.

lierdumoa

Imagine being so brainwashed by toxic masculinity that you think people who express visible distress over being exploited and degraded by morally bankrupt employers are “pussies,” but that your own quiet, meek, passive acceptance of getting perpetually fucked over by your boss is brave and manly in comparison.

unclefather

basketballhoopshowerhead

(Chanting) ancient cheese with a deadly disease ancient cheese with a deadly disease ancient c

sci-the-superb

CAN WE STILL EAT THE FUCKING BOG BUTTER?

dreamingofbabylon

Fellas we’ve got ourselves 2 outta 3 ingredience for a legendary Grilled Cheese

socialmediapeasant

Grilled cheese!!!!

dreamingofbabylon

HELL YEA BAYBEE WE DONE IT !! GOD HERSELF GONNA GRILL US A CHEESE

socialmediapeasant

Tonight we dine like kings

foointerrupted

This is still my favorite post on this whole site

emotions-oper9r-deactivated2021

I’m here for the fossilized tomato

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sistertaxon

breaking news: queen elizabeth, the mom from the royal family, is a nasty little thottie. and she just died from making it clap on instagram

classlesschapps

i’m using the notes on this post as my metric for whether or not i should check in on her. every time i see it it’s only a few hundred higher than the last time. but when she hits it for real…. i have all my money on finding out from this post

honestlyitsjustsam

dragon age 4 legit aint coming out…at this point gta and skyrim modders will have to make the games out of the mods of dai or else nothin

amygdalae

ok this is hilarious

ginniewheezie

Important

squishysquishin

Adding this because they’re safe for dogs too

simon-newman

How are turkey skin and bones not safe? Please elaborate.

thumbbro

Dunno about skin, but Turkey bones, and avian bones in general, are really easy to shatter. If a dog eats said shards, it could tear up their insides.

edwinflores428

Important for all pet users!!

gallifrey-knits-no-more

The skin is very fatty and can lead to diarrhea, vomiting, and/or pancreatitis. Pancreatitis can lead to a very expensive hospital stay, and is quite painful. When in doubt, best not to feed human food.

thebookbakery

Important PSA for this (and every) holiday season! As someone with dogs and cats in her life, both of these are nice to have on hand!

radiation

gaymer-lvl100

This wasn't a meme... It was a prophecy.

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notjusthespongenextdoor

i feel like when i first started hearing the phrase “oh that fucks” it was in reference to something that had kind of a charismatic machismo to it and did sort of carry the sense of “oh that thing is sexual and can Get It” but it’s now transformed into something that just means “wow i really like that thing” and that’s so funny to me. like i just said “this rug fucks” what does that mean. can this rug get it

captainlividllama

They call that shag carpet dude

arystocrat

give her a keese

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