"How come it looks so much like my arm?"

how insane must it have felt to be an actor table reading for bbc merlin. alright anthony this week, you are driven mad by memories of the children you killed in your genocide. next week? bald.

no but imagine your dad just hired this guy to work for you whom you hate and after a few weeks of working for you, the two of you are starting to get along and then suddenly one night when you’ve dressed him in a silly hat someone tries to poison you but he calls them out and has to drink the poison himself and you watch as his body crashes to the floor. you feel your adrenaline spike as you rush to his side, leaning over his motionless body and you know in that moment you would go to great lengths to save him (over and over again)

uther pendragon sucks ass obviously but he’s such a hysterical fucking character. he hates magic so obviously his daughter is a seer and his son’s weird little guy he’s obsessed with is the literal walking manifastation of magic itself. he gets tricked into marrying and fucking a literal troll. his son and aforementioned weird little guy keep trying to sacrifice themselves for each other and being so fucking gay right in front of him no matter how much he tries to stop them and at some point he’s just like yeah fine what fucking ever just dont fucking die i guess. his daughter hates his guts and keeps telling him to die and she’s somehow still his favorite. he fucked a troll. his son gets enchanted into falling in love with a new girl every other week and it never works because he’s so damn gay. his daughter is definitely in love with the daughter of a guy he killed but whatever. a weird little thing posesses his doctor and he makes him bald. he dies and comes back as a ghost to haunt his son and he only finally sends him back after he tries to attack the same fucking weird little guy who really is the bane of his existence. he fucked a troll.

BBC Merlin is insane as a show. Its an adaptation of Arthurian mythos. It's inspired by CW's Smallville (this is 100% real look it up). it stars 4 unknown 20 somethings and British acting legends. It's aimed at kids and families. its a tragedy. Its campy as hell. It will make you cry. It asks you, like Merlin, to believe in the Golden age of Camelot. It never shows you that Golden age. Everyone in the show is the most beautiful person you'll ever see. people will clown on the CGI. Its one of the most homerotic shows of the 2000's. Its an on purpose allegory for queerphobia, but those allegorious queer characters are largely villains. If you watched it when you were 12 you will never quite be able to let it go. This is a curse. This is an experience you wouldn't give up for the world.

bbc merlin has a lot of faults but i do think the way they blithely ignored the existence of christianity was very funny of them