Alysoun

well, newsflash, there is no “right way”. If someone believed they were trans, lived as a trans person, experienced the ups and downs of gender dysphoria/euphoria, went thru the trouble of social and medical transition and through that journey, that person said “wait…I don’t think this fits me anymore.” seems pretty trans to me.

and that’s okay, it’s okay to change your mind. you were trans.

or if you want to say “I wasn’t trans I was x thing instead” that’s also okay.

what isn’t okay is to police other people’s language about their journey. to police someone’s identity because it makes you uncomfortable. like it or not, real trans people detransition. whether they decide they are actually cis, trans but in a different way, or another identity that fits them better is up to that individual person and doesn’t invalidate their previous LIVED EXPERIENCE as a trans person.

If your knee jerk reaction to someone saying they were trans for a period of time, then decided to detransition is “well you were never trans at all!” mayhaps examine why that’s the first thing you think to say, instead of something a bit more constructive or positive. Like what happened to “oh I’m glad you were able to find an identity that worked for you” as an example.

exclusive focus on feminism instead of gender & sex equality is especially missing the point when looking at sexism from a non-white, non-cis angle, feminism is supposed to fight for women, femininity, femaleness, specifically, & position men, masculinity, maleness, as the oppressor, how then does that encourage you to see those you perceive as more masculine or feminine? under this framework, racists HAVE & DONE lynched black men for being dangers to women, they HAVE & DONE excluded black women from sufferage, transphobic bathroom bills are constantly justified by & extentions of laws that see "women" as a restrictable, protected class

I think that's fully possible! People can be very fluid. Your interests six years ago are probably different than they are now. You've since discovered new things about yourself. That doesn't mean that six years ago, your favorite tv show wasn't your favorite tv show, or what you were studying in college wasn't your major, or the job you had wasn't what you did for a living - it just means it's changed in the past six years.

However, you do not get to say that it "looks disgusting", "is icky", "is just a clit", "is ugly" or "doesn't even look male". That's being an asshole to people who want or have bottom growth. You do not get to call other people's genitals ugly. You do not get to police what other people should look like or be comfortable with. You have absolutely zero authority over other people's bodies.

Can't call it misogyny because then you'll be "misgendering yourself" and "holding onto your AGAB"

Can't call it transmisogyny because well, that's only for trans women and transfems

Can't call it transandrophobia because that's a "made up word" and "stop co-opting transfeminist language"

It's a type of transphobia, yes. Same as how transmisogyny, transmisogynoir, and exorsexism are all types of transphobia.

Though I do wonder how many of the people I came across were actually just pretending to be white in order to be accepted/avoid racism, raceplay-pushing, etc. I've heard some black people speak on creating "whitesonas" as kids, and in a similar vein pretending to be white online in kink spaces would offer a good amount of safety and respect.