Welcome to the Landfill

having feelings that contradict your morals is soooo fucking annnoooooyyyiiingggggg. can the emotions and logic department get on the same page im tired of having to like strangle myself into being a tolerable person

wound dressings and bandages are lingerie for the enlightened pervert

functionally suicidal character saying “I would die for you” to their significant other and its like. I get the sentiment, honey, but if a hot dog vendor told me he’d sell hot dogs for me, I wouldn’t feel very moved now would I

Now a functionally suicidal character saying “I will live for you”. Now that’s a dynamic I can sink my teeth into.

now how about a functionally suicidal character saying "I will sell hot dogs for you"

Hotdog vender lays down their life to protect their suicidal partner, who then takes over the hotdog stand to carry on their memory...

Reblogging in honor of the first day of baseball season.

A truthberry might make you tell the truth... But a lieberry? A lieberry will loan you books

I’m literally always saying this. U have to kill yourself to just look like some guy in a shirt

fuuuck I could use a mysterious benefactor right now

love island should introduce a "scheming eunuch" islander who is like a smart and completely asexual islander exempt from being kicked off or being made to participate in any challenges and they're just there to provide advice and be a sort of sounding board for the other islanders when they need a disinterested party to talk things through with. but the scheming eunuch has secret goals unbeknownst to anyone e.g. a cash prize for talking a certain couple into breaking up etc.

something i find frustrating about Life lately is how people just absolutely refuse to experience any discomfort. and i dont mean this in the boomer "wah kids have it too easy theyre all pushovers and pussies" way, but i mean people will go crazy over anything thats not totally 100% sanitised and comfortable and pure and whatever the fuck. a show has a sex scene and you dont like it? people used to just look away for a second and maybe cringe. now it's a whole thinkpiece. people would rather ghost their friends or let issues fester rather than ever address an issue in their relationship with them. they wont let their friends vent in case it makes them uncomfortable. like can you just buck the fuck up and let things be a bit awkward sometimes? it wont kill you.