frog? frog?

number one rule! never believe ur thoughts after 10 pm . unless its about The Character then believe all of your thoughts wholeheartedly

I have GOT to stop spending $30

scientists are experimenting on cross-breeding a crab and a cheetah; things could go sideways real fast

everything will probably be fine but i have to get really anxious just in case

This is your captain speaking and yeah we’re not landing. I just feel like we’ve got a really good thing up here and I don’t want to ruin it. This is my home and you are my people

We never have to go back

in a way i am my own dead wife

i just apolitically killed the king like i have no agenda or whatever im just the jester here but i stabbed him anyway LOL all the courtiers and advisors are trying really hard to figure out who did it LOL all of them wanted him dead but they dont know whose scheme it was so nobody can promulgate a coherent political maneuver based on the circumstances LOL just playing my lute #MyLute

Ever wonder why they call it nicotine? It’s cause in the old days, a pack of cigarettes only cost a nickel. BTW, you look like shit. Are you OK?