Superultrafinal!

Bros lets make summer an unforgettable ero guro adventure together

let me put this in terms you can fucking understand. our toddler, Falco Mewtwo Martinez, “wavedashed” straight into a “stage hazard” because you weren’t fucking watching him.

Tryin' get my gun? Or tryin' say somethin' bad word?

Come to the library. We will laminate your penis for free.

small town diner waitress voice: Omelas? Oh, oh no, easy mistake, you're in oh - MAY - las right now, with an A. Plenty' people get the name mixed up. Nope, no utopia here, just our small little town. *face gets really grim* We do still.. Okay well we do still have a kid that we... I mean it isn't working but- well- You know. It- It's fine. I'm sure it'll start working soon.

ur girlfriend/boyfriend should NOT be ur first priority... ur first priority should ALWAYS be me, ur tumblr mutual

theres a whole album of song titles you can make just from the words of this tweet

this makes smoking weed sound so much cooler than it is