different. sometimes happy.

Saw a tweet about mamdani solving the astrophage crisis and now im just imagining them sending mamdani to space

#i was gazeboed mate #i was absolutely baubled

Meanwhile, “utter” works for the first (e.g., “you utter floorboard”) but somehow “utterly” doesn’t seem to work as well for the second (“I was utterly floorboarded”).

Utterly doesn’t work for drunk because it’s the affix for turning random objects into terms for *shocked*, obviously.

Is it a glitch or a feature?

Feature

"So if you win the duel, you get to take her on a date." They both nodded. "And if she wins the duel, she gets to take you on a date." They both nodded. "So why don't you both just... Skip that and go on a date?" They both glared.

honey is the only food product that never spoils. there are pots of honey that are over five thousand years old and still completely edible

i also want to point out we know it tastes the same even after thousands of years b/c archaeologists who discovered two thousand year old honey tasted it. presumably right after they looked at each other and went “what the hell here goes nothing”

I’m pretty sure they also identify human remains by taste. Archaeologists are straight up freaks.

mai nam is jane and wen i dig i fynde some roks both smol and big i put my tung upon the stone for science yes i lik the bone

I’m sitting with a bunch of archaeologists and we just laughed so hard we CRIED we’re getting tshirts with this on them

I will never ever get tired of seeing bredlik poems. It is really one of the seminal art forms of the century. I am not being sarcastic. 

If I ever don’t reblog this, assume I’m dead and archaeologists are licking my bones.

I’d honestly be scared as fuck if a bunch of basic shapes came floating towards me. Yellow Prism. Red Sphere? Fuck that.

You are really gonna freak out when I tell you about the sun

The Sun's fine as long as it stays over there

this made me smile, sending you warm vibes today

… How warm?

this is my own personal bitch fest: for the love of gods stop giving ryland grace fucking shredded abs

Don't worry, mutual with a zero-note post. I've added your post to my queue. So, in 6-8 business weeks, we're going to do big numbers! Such as, 1.

You've been able to understand animals your whole life. Though, to be fair, it's not as interesting as it sounds - it's mostly demands of sex, cries for help, or stuff concerning food. And so it was until yesterday when you overheard two frogs discussing the finer points of quantum physics.

The queen is 6 years old. The plan was to, like, have a regent or something, but she’s doing such a good job that no one can be bothered.

there’s just no way he fucks good I’m sorry. that’s the appeal. to me

need him apologizing and crying on it

I work at a pizza place canonically now. I makea the pizza 🤌

Jacksepticeye is a STUPID youtuber name. Hi i'm Jonathan Poopy Eye. Ok bro

Ok well there happens to be deep lore and strong reasons for the name!! I’m very complex