honey, i'm home

Day 2: Ice Skating!!!

chongyun is the most oblivious person alive. this boy canonically struggles to grasp that novels contain made up people. xingqiu could drop hints as heavy as breeze blocks and chongyun would still never pick up on them in a million years

he is also very ignorant about his own emotions because he has to keep them so tightly under control. chongyun's popsicles get 100% less effective when xingqiu refers to him as 'dear', but chongyun's just like hmm I have no idea why this could be. I guess this must mean I need to change the ingredients

if chongyun gets too warm then there is a very real chance his yang energy will flip the fuck out. xingqiu could make him blush and chongyun would be like Oh God Oh Fuck I Need To Eat Cold Noodles With Mountain Delicacies Right This Second

Loki fits in with the other protagonist’s personas because he used to have wacky heist adventures with his sworn bff Odin.

Loki: I can’t believe I’m going to have to distract the guard stallion by turning into a mare in heat and letting it fuck me with its massive cock. Odin: You don’t have to, we’ll find another way? Loki: Nah, I’m going to do it.

And that’s how Sleipnir happened.

Loki was ‘the dude who solved problems’ in Norse myth. With proposed solutions involving things like the above monsterfucking mpreg, crossdressing and gay marriage.

Immortal rapist targeting your wife and none of the other gods can help you although they wish they could because the bastard has done Some Shit? Loki is like ‘I got you, I kept his mom from making him invulnerable against mistletoe as a prank.’ (Seriously, pre-Christianity revising things to satanize Loki and of course you can’t have a God of Light be an Absolute Monster, Baldur had it coming.)

Loki only went ‘burn the world’ after his kids got murdered and/or imprisoned and he was tied up and subjected to Chinese Water Torture except with venom by order of the same sworn bff he’d helped countless times.