confessions

I would love to unclench my jaw one day

do you know how much of a letdown it was to grow up smelling the aged whiskey in my grandpa's pantry. the wine in my parents' dinner glasses. the anise liquor on summer evenings. and finally being of drinking age and finding out it all kinda just tastes like car exhaust

"Oh, not you as well, Brutus!" in that voice is the best translation of 'Et tu, Brute?' I've ever heard.

At this rate, Caesar won't even show up on the day. You tipped him off.

It’s a cannon event

I mean, he was very much warned and still showed up

whatever.

i dont caaaaaare

google search how to make someone explode

divine intervention where my guardian angel just beats the shit outta me

This happened on Supernatural once

Majoring in creative writing was a colossal mistake that ruined my life financially artistically socially and spiritually BUT i got to read aloud from My Immortal to a crowd of twenty horrified bystanders for academic credit. So I broke even

The assignment was to bring a story written by someone else and share the first paragraph with the class. Nowhere in the assignment description or the syllabus did it specify that the story had to be good