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you know what they say

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keplercryptids

i don't "date" and i don't "chill" and i don't "hang out." i make pacts. i swear oaths. i forge unbreakable bonds. this makes me a cool breezy person to take on road trips et cetera

innerchildabortionclinic

interesting kink assortment on the dash

ichimakesart

Pygmalion

"Stop fidgeting! I'm trying to work out the details..."

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mysharona1987

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wizardarchetypes

in that guy’s defense i was standing in the sun in a lowcut skirt so my belly was out and i was holding two sandwiches, a bag of cheetos, and a giant bag of mixed bulk sour candy and my hair is perfect today so maybe he was overcome at the sight of me in a way that’s never happened before

wizardarchetypes

????!!!!!!!! some guy just walked by me and said OUT LOUD “what the hell is she doing here….” VOICED LIKE THE SHY INNER MONOLOGUE OF A CARTOON CHARACTER AND THEN HE SAID TO ME “you look marvelous…”

HUH 😭😭😭

wizardarchetypes

Im losing my fucking mind i wish i could do an audio post to truly embody his voice acting for his inner monologue he sounded like a funimation dub idk what to do

wizardarchetypes

also so important for you to understand that he was in his 60s at LEAST

wizardarchetypes

it was so diabolical i looked around for anyone else and checked him for meta glasses in case he was doing a tiktok skit or something i mean it

dozydawn

renthony

It's wild to watch the phrase "tumblr sexyman" morph into "man that tumblr thinks is sexy," because when I first saw the phrase come into use, I always saw it used in reference to the phenomenon of "when presented with a wide array of fictional characters, tumblr will always pick the skinny white man to obsess over, and if the fan-favorite character has no canonical human appearance, the fandom will inevitably create a popular fanon of the character as as a skinny white man."

When I hear "tumblr sexyman," I think of Cecil Night Vale being constantly depicted as a skinny white man instead of literally anything else. I think of the background character white men who get elevated over protagonists that are women, people of color, or otherwise not the white man power fantasy.

"Tumblr sexyman" is, like. An insult. I DON'T want any of my blorbos to win a "tumblr sexyman" poll. "Tumblr sexyman" is the exact opposite of what I want my own OCs to be. If any of my characters ever get called "tumblr sexyman," I will have to immediately re-evaluate myself and the art I'm making.

renthony

Things I think of when I hear "tumblr sexyman":

Cecil Night Vale, as previously mentioned.

Oncelercest, because if there aren't two skinny white men to ship, tumblr fandom will start shipping the skinny white man with himself.

Bill Cipher inexplicably being fanon'd as a white twink despite being a fucking triangle.

Everyone fawning over Marvel Loki while shoving every woman and Black person in the MCU aside.

The way nearly every single character in Hazbin Hotel has the same "tall and skinny" body type, along with all the criticisms Black audience members have made about the issues with Alastor's design.

The way tumblr got obsessed with the white man villain in Sinners.

paleozoiccatboyblood

wyrm-town

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facts-i-just-made-up

Face reveal? I wanna see the mug that cracked all those mirrors

I don’t actually have what people usually call a “face” and that may be part of the problem.

Since you said “mug” though here is a Cronenberg inspired Mugwump mug that I made when a friend got one of those Cricut presses:

lokaror

They used idiot ore to forge u bro

siena-sevenwits

Hey everyone, looks like the “cat summoned for jury duty” was ai generated - even has the ai symbol at the top. Thanks for the heads up, @cannot-all-throw-inkpots . My apologies- I did not realize when I shared it.

theriu

Aww dangit. Guess that makes sense, but it was so believable because I can 100% see that kind of goofup happening

theriu

Some positive news: There really WAS a cat summoned for jury duty back in 2010. Turns out the error was quickly corrected and the cat did NOT actually have to travel to the courthouse. But at least we can enjoy the fact that a papereork glitch did once try to give a cat jury duty XD

jihadibarbie

genuinely me

theharlotofferelden

Okay but the article is fucking sending me

dogpuppy

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Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

undying-princess

they're executing the count from sesame street for violating the masquerade

kidzbopdeathgrips

FUCKING ÖTZI THE ICE MAN FOR ICE 🧊🥶

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