Maggie/Moira / 25 / autistic lesbian / ♓ / TME / she/they
Personal and art blog
I love cats computers and YURI!!!!!!!!!!!
They hate me for my silly weird butch swag
MY CARRD / MY NEOCITIES
I don't quite have a concrete DNI. I'll make it pretty clear the kind of people I don't want to be around anyways, but just so I'm crystal clear: TERFs/radfems go to hell, proshippers fuck off, AI/NFT shills eat drywall. I'm also not cool with people who use the R slur or "substitutes" for it like "restarted". All this aside, expect me to simply block you if I do not like you. I block very liberally.
I reblog untagged political posts fairly often.
I tend to use a lot of big words and overexplain things like my interests, opinions, and certain thought processes. This is both because I am a nerd (🤓) and also because I am incredibly autistic. I also swear a fuck ton.
I try to be vigilant about tagging spoilers. If I've ever missed tagging spoilers on any posts that needed them, let me know.
There's no need to be shy around me. If you want to talk to me or tag me in something, I welcome it! You won't be bothering me anywhere near as much as you think you are.
I try to attach image descriptions to the alt text in a lot my original posts with images. If I ever happen to miss one, I welcome people adding image descriptions themselves, or simply messaging me and telling me I didn't add an image description. I will add one myself ASAP or reblog your added description.
Obligatory image dump because I see a lot of people do that on their pinneds:
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[id. A twitter post by @/Bennieeexyz
Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat.
Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records.
My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now.
Called the county clerk.
Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty.
Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons?
Me: Yes, but he's a cat.
Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county?
Me: He's a legal cat.
Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption.
Me: He can't file anything. He has paws.
Clerk: You can file on his behalf.
Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat."
Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons."
Me: What's the medical reason?
Clerk: He's a cat.
Me: That's not a medical condition.
Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving.
Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later.
"Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement."
Took the letter to my vet.
Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty.
Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty?
Me: Excellent question. No good answer.
Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten.
Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve?
Vet: On what grounds?
Me: He's a cat.
Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings."
Me: Perfect.
Sent it in. Got another rejection.
"Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court."
My roommate thought this was hilarious.
Roommate: Felix is going to jail.
Me: This is serious.
Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens.
Decided that was actually the only option left.
Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters.
Checked in at the courthouse.
Clerk: Name?
Me: Felix Martinez.
Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix?
Me: Yes.
Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat.
Me: I've been saying that for six weeks.
Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption?
Me: I filed three. All rejected.
Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief.
Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation?
Me: Twice.
Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this.
Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me.
Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote?
Me: You tell me.
Supervisor: This is a data error.
Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out.
They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience.
Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry.
Me: Appreciate it.
Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted?
Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats.
Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card.
For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was.
Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud.
Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent.
Roommate: That's what they all say.
Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now.
Fitting end to his legal career.
end id]
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I dont think humans are meant to be monogamous like your relationship is destined for failure unless you sometimes include the little green alien that taps on the window at night
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