sleepy

my corner store guy is a 50 year old man who's my best friend in the world and recently he was like "you're too pretty to be single I have some nephews you should meet. very handsome!" and I was like "a niece might be more up my alley" and he just got more excited and said "ah even better! I was overselling my nephews but my nieces are very beautiful"

i wonder what they're gossiping about

I appreciate the sentiment but I don't get all those "we made it to the longest night of the year! the light will start returning soon! it's all uphill from here & we're halfway there!" posts because like. Oct-Dec is the easier half of Winter. Jan-Apr is way harder. there's no big holidays or decorations, everyone is kind of over the whole Cozy Hygge Sweaters & Cocoa vibe so they're just tired & restless instead, and the whole thing is so drawn out & uneventful that it feels like it lasts 10x longer

Oh No!

Sometimes I get the "I can fix him" urge for a fictional character but like not in a sexy way. I can fix him with the power of friendship. I look at him the way a 12 yr old horse girl looks at an abused stallion that has injured its last 3 riders but she knows that it will sense her good vibes and she'll be the first person to show it kindness. That man is a skittish horse to me.

it’s december 1 where’s the christmas tail kitten bring him to me

writing is easy actually. all you have to do is tell people what happened

[trying to insult a person's dog-like devotion to someone but not wanting to make them sound too cool about it] keep your fucking dog in a purse

I couldn’t be a mom id be scaring my kids id be like hear that thunder that’s god that’s god and he’s coming to get us

thought it was a one-off thing, but i've now seen multiple pictures and videos of red-bellied woodpeckers touching other birds with their tongue at bird feeders. why are they suck little freaks?

i am once again asking