Moved to @the-ghost-of-the-north-seas

how does NASA organise a birthday party? they PLANET

“Banana!”

* day is fixed* 

ok. i super needed this.

THIS. The whole world should watch this.

how am i supposed to make creative funny text posts when nothing happens in my life at all

you just use a story from sims and pretend it really happened to you

one time i was swimming but the pool ladders disappeared so i couldn’t get out of the pool and i swam for 10 hours then died

classic

my mom phoned me today and told me that someone in my hometown had robbed the pharmacy at gunpoint but the pharmacist started having an anxiety attack and the robbers were so worried about her they offered to call her an ambulance while they were robbing her

Was this in Canada?

of course it was