hey

[woman who has never been gentle with herself voice] I just need to be more disciplined

Did I ever talk abt the time i was at a bdsm club and one of the pups was on all fours and barking and being cute and the dom on scene was like “hi puppy! Do you do any tricks?” And he said “I can beatbox!”

I was like. Doubled over incapacitated laughing the entire time. He was really good and a big sweetheart and I felt kinda bad but I couldn’t stop thinking “why the am I getting the beatboxing puppy unskippable cutscene at the bdsm club”

my least favorite literary smut turn of phrase is when a guy is like “im gonna ruin this pussy” “im gonna wreck this pussy for anyone else” like stop.. thats not yours…!

but actually genuinely why is the ant sad and leaving with a bindle

ugh of course he has two mothers. they just had to make it woke. and one of them's made of cloth and the other wire too. sick of this forced diversity bullshit