Thank God For Switzerland!

Love seeing little pawprints. So fucking magical. There was a little guy here.

mice are having sex in my walls :(

never thought i'd get accused of faking having a mice infestation for tumblr clout and yet here we are

you fucked those mice yourself

I fucked those mice myself

What if we did infantaljzed body positivity for bald men. You’re so brave for being bald. Bald is beautiful . That’s not a bald spot that’s my eagle mark

thinking about how milk jugs are so perfectly designed; not a bit of wasted space. the handle is part of the container as well and you can clearly see how much of the liquid is left. genius. im thinking of eating the mushroom growing in my frontyard whole. if even one person is nice to me today i will kiss them on the lips

heavy is the head that wears the cat ears

Wearing my sluttiest outfit to the vampire infested forest tonight lads. Wish me luck!

Ben and Jerry’s is dangerous ice cream... capitalizes on the evolutionary human instinct to dig for chunks... before you know it half the pint gone

primal memory of rooting around in dirt for little chocolate fish

those words you never wanna hear... fee fi fo fum

personality quiz: do you think the sexiest fruit is pomegranate or mango 

what are things you could confidently info dump about? if I needed a beginner’s course on something, what could I go to you about?

why doth the human body ooze when provoked

theres an ooze for just about every brand of human provocation and plainly i am sick of it

was going to elucidate on this matter but then realized i was accidentally inventing the four humors again

@wires-walter-the-automaton W HY DO I IMAGINE ACE MAKIGN THIS WHILE DRUNk

Because this is definitely something he would do! He would probably make it for Peter. Also, is that cheese?

i first thought it was butter fsr lmao ace would be on his knees begging peter to eat it, crying and all but peter keeps denying then gene comes in to save peter’s life by agreeing to eat it for him (because there’s no doubt in mind he wouldn’t) and luckily ace couldn’t hear them discussing the plan over his own sobbing ace then looks up and notices it gone, peter then shyly exclaiming “yeah it… actually was really good, i’m sorry ace” and ace is sO HAPPY he gets up to hug peter and peter hugs back, feeling bad for lying to his sweet spaceman but it was kind of worth it at least gene got his midnight snack bc it’s literally 2 in the morning

hey what the fuck are you talking about

oh my god they’re talking about the band Kiss

shut the fuck up

THEYRE TALKING ABOUT FUCKING KISS?

certified iconic post