soc college au where kaz goes around campus killing all the people above inej on the waitlist for a class she really wants to take
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@yourstupidface
soc college au where kaz goes around campus killing all the people above inej on the waitlist for a class she really wants to take

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kind of obsessed with how the crows all have this thing where they'll do something nice for their crush and they are (very clearly) doing it because they have a crush and then go "yeah. let's not dwell on what possessed me to do that"...they're not even unreliable narrators really they're just so avoidant. they're so stupid
it's a running gag among the crows that the others intentionally misinterpret kaz's theatrical monologues so he has to explain them to ruin the dramatic effect he's always gunning for
like one day they're having a conversation about whatever and the subject of mothers comes up and matthias frowns and goes "i thought kaz's mother is in ketterdam?" and the others are like what are you talking about and he goes yeah remember when he told us that his mother is in ketterdam? she birthed him in the harbor? and the others start laughing and strip away kaz's melodrama to explain the metaphor and it's so obvious that it's killing kaz but he doesn't say anything until matthias just smiles, exaggeratedly polite, and goes "well you know my kerch isn't that good" and everyone bursts out laughing again
(nina orchestrated that entire conversation)
they're scheming and kaz is thinking aloud about which dregs member they can use for the job and wylan innocently goes "what about Greed?" and everyone goes ??? and he goes yeah remember how kaz said "Greed bows to me? he is my servant?" seems like someone we could rely on"
and everyone does an exaggerated job of explaining to a smirking wylan that Greed is in fact not a crow
wylan calls jesper an investment within kaz's range of hearing then goes "what? is that not how you refer to the love of your life in ketterdam?"
No but I don't think Kaz gave Wylan and Jesper a heads up abt the tunnel digging until like Wylan and Jesper probably heard construction noises under their floorboards and they're going crazy abt it bc wth is going on and they casually mention it to kaz like
Jesper: I haven't been able to sleep in ages! Kaz: ok. Jesper: It's getting on my nerves. Kaz: ok Jesper: I heard construction noises under my floors every day and its driving me crazy Kaz: ah wait ok about that like i had a vision in mind- --timeskip-- Jesper: YOU DID WHAT Kaz: for gang-related business, ofc. definitely not bc i miss u or anything like that haha Kaz: ....
it's a running gag among the crows that the others intentionally misinterpret kaz's theatrical monologues so he has to explain them to ruin the dramatic effect he's always gunning for
like one day they're having a conversation about whatever and the subject of mothers comes up and matthias frowns and goes "i thought kaz's mother is in ketterdam?" and the others are like what are you talking about and he goes yeah remember when he told us that his mother is in ketterdam? she birthed him in the harbor? and the others start laughing and strip away kaz's melodrama to explain the metaphor and it's so obvious that it's killing kaz but he doesn't say anything until matthias just smiles, exaggeratedly polite, and goes "well you know my kerch isn't that good" and everyone bursts out laughing again
(nina orchestrated that entire conversation)
they're scheming and kaz is thinking aloud about which dregs member they can use for the job and wylan innocently goes "what about Greed?" and everyone goes ??? and he goes yeah remember how kaz said "Greed bows to me? he is my servant?" seems like someone we could rely on"
and everyone does an exaggerated job of explaining to a smirking wylan that Greed is in fact not a crow

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it's a running gag among the crows that the others intentionally misinterpret kaz's theatrical monologues so he has to explain them to ruin the dramatic effect he's always gunning for
like one day they're having a conversation about whatever and the subject of mothers comes up and matthias frowns and goes "i thought kaz's mother is in ketterdam?" and the others are like what are you talking about and he goes yeah remember when he told us that his mother is in ketterdam? she birthed him in the harbor? and the others start laughing and strip away kaz's melodrama to explain the metaphor and it's so obvious that it's killing kaz but he doesn't say anything until matthias just smiles, exaggeratedly polite, and goes "well you know my kerch isn't that good" and everyone bursts out laughing again
(nina orchestrated that entire conversation)
thinking about how kaz refusing to give jesper the parem even though it would make for good insurance while telling jesper that colm values his life more than he does a plot of land was kaz himself telling jesper that he values him and his well-being above the scheme and the money to be made
the crows are so young. they're so young. they make fun of wylan for playing the flute and being a bad criminal. they love waffles. they mock kaz's bad haircut. matthias mentally addresses kaz only with insults for nearly the whole two books. they have all been jealous of each other showing other people attention at some point -- jesper is jealous of anyone kaz gives attention to. matthias is jealous of anyone nina gives attention to. kaz is jealous of how comfortable the others are with each other. wylan is jealous of kuwei flirting with jesper -- they're all insecure at some point. nina gets mad at them for eating her cookies. they're all horny and fantasize about their crushes while actively running for their lives. they all want to kill the woman they kidnapped because she's whiny. they tease inej for sounding philosophical. they have secret hand signals. jesper and nina make sex jokes all the time and love to make others blush. they spite each other. they threatened to tattletale on each other to each other. they compete over who has the biggest bounty on his head. inej uses "being a matthias" as an insult. kaz and jesper have a physical scrap and have to be pulled apart by an Adult. i adore them so much
there's something so outrageously poetic about the crows saying “no mourners, no funerals.” instead of “good luck.” when actually the statement could not be any further from the truth.
because yes, maybe they are a gang of wayward nobodies. maybe they would not be grieved by way of gold caskets or weeping crowds. but god how they would grieve eachother.
they've fought side by side, bled together, laughed together, schemed and thieved together. they would mourn eachother like a family mourns each other.
they think they're bound together by their insignificance, by their wrecked backgrounds and losses, by the fact they would have no mourners, and no funerals. but they’re bound together by the fact that no matter the job, the fight, the reward, if one were to fall the others would mourn them. because they ARE a family. they are eachother's mourners.
the number of times jesper says "i'm cooked" or "we're cooked" through the books is highly entertaining

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do u think in the grishaverse rather than it being Victorian child/man/women jokes it’s Fjerdan?
Like:
“I feel a fjerdan man seeing ankle for the first time.”
“This sentence would kill a fjerdan child.”
“Not to sound like fjerdan woman suffering from hysteria—”
(Yes the crows 100% make these jokes and it drives Matthias insane) (Kaz and Nina are the primary offenders)
whenever people say that they dont think the crows act like teenagers i have to laugh because. like. as a teenager. they do. they're relatively mature because they're all severely traumatized and had to grow up fast (also because considering the time period it's based on it's completely reasonable for younger kids to be expected to do more) but they still act like teenagers. i've seen a bunch of people mention the "my ghost wont associate with your ghost" convo and "pay someone to pay someone to burn your kruge" but also, Jesper makes multiple sex jokes. Inej purposefully takes the harder route Kaz can't handle so he'll let her go alone. Wylan complains about pretty much everything. Nina spends most of the first book needling and pissing off her ex because she enjoys it. Kaz spends half his energy trying to be mysterious and cool. Matthias calls Kaz a demon for most of the books because he doesn't like him. Kuwei uses the fact that he looks like his crush's crush to kiss his crush. he also pretends he doesn't know Kerch because he didnt want to talk to people.
and, hands down the most teenager scene in the entire duology, Kaz and Jesper get in an argument and start a fucking fist fight. they are literally rolling on the ground punching each other. and everyone just fucking stands there. watching. Wylan wants someone to stop them but no one does. because they're not actively trying to kill each other. so whatever its fine. and then afterwards they're besties again. that is how 99% of the fights at my school go my dude, they are SUCH teenagers.
frosbite studios blessing us with this GORGEOUS fanart, as per usual
Look. I’m just saying it would be pretty funny if in 7 years Alby Rollins just rolls up to Ketterdam one day like “Hi, I’m here to engage in teenage rebellion and rumor has it my da thinks you suck so I want to join the Dregs.”
And poor Kaz just has to be like “I once threatened your life???”
And Alby just remains adamant because, “yes, and I thank you for that. It makes my job of pissing my father off so much easier. You were an obvious choice. I wouldn’t have traveled all the way from the Wandering Isle if I thought this wouldn’t work.”
Meanwhile…
Kaz Brekker age 9 realizing the guy who killed his brother is literally the most powerful man in the city: ...I just need to lock the fuck in—

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Really, really need people to understand how important it is that Matthias kept his faith while unlearning the toxic beliefs that people had instilled in him. That’s really important to his character actually.
i hate the shadow and bone cast omg they're all such DORKS like just their fucking humour and they all binged the books in days and they're all so emotionally invested in these characters and their story and they all sound intelligent and also woke and are talented and then they have the AUDACITY to look the way they do? like there isn't a single member of the cast who isn't fine as hell and i just think that's supremely unfair