michie

Oh. You didn’t expect to see Hyunjin again. Well. He’s part of the friend group. So it’s inevitable. Still, you prefer to mentally prepare yourself for situations like this. Or any social situation if you’re honest.

“Chill, Min. It’s fine. No worries,” you calm him down.

“Alright,” your roommate says with a soft smile, before getting up and walking towards the door.

Minho allows Hyunjin entrance and they head towards the couch where you’re seated. It’s awkward. Hyunjin greets you, you say hello back. Then these two start discussing some dance related stuff.

You’re sipping on your second beer, not really understanding why you’re not just standing up and going to your room. But maybe you’ve got a bit of a fear of missing out. You’re curious what could happen.

Especially regarding the fact that you’re pretty sure that Hyunjin commented on your videos. It’s the same username he uses on Discord and Steam when playing Levanter. He’s the one that reported some creeps that wanted to share that security video of you and Chan on the train.

Well, he just have realised it’s you, right? After all, Hyunjin and you have slept together a handful of times. He knows your body. Pretty well.

“Y/N? Can we talk?” he suddenly breaks the silence. Great. You don’t have to do it anymore. You’ve never experienced him being so… talkative. Regarding the fact he ended things without further explanation.

“Sure,” you murmur, taking another sip from your beer.

“I’m… I don’t want to make you uncomfortable but I also wanna be honest. I-I found your Stargirl account and… uhm… I’ve been watching your video for some days…”

Wow. That was… direct. You wished he would have always been like this.

But what’s the purpose behind it? Maybe he already suspects you to be aware of it and doesn’t want his boyfriend to know.

“Why are you telling me this? Do you want me to convince you to not tell Felix?” you ask, raising one eyebrow.

He looks at you confused, blinks twice. “What? No. He’s fine with it.”

What. The. Fuck?

“Fine with it? Your boyfriend is okay with you jerking off to your ex? Is this some kind of kink?”

Solely speaking it out loud sounds like an April fool’s day joke.

“Chill. You’re not my ex, we weren’t serious.” Ouch. “Plus, he was the one who discovered your videos and sent them to me.”

Is this a fever dream? Have you caught the flu?

“I… am not in a position to judge your relationship dynamic. Still weird.” That’s the best word to describe it. However, you’re a little relieved there’s not more drama connected to it. Still—one aspect hits you right in the heart. “Hyune?”

“Yeah?”

“So, it wasn’t serious you say?” you ask him.

“Please,” he scoffs, “as if you’ve ever seen me as more than some friends with benefits situation.”

“Huh? You took me out on dates, that’s a lot more than that,” you remind him.

Feelings have always been involved. At least from your side. You think so.

“Yeah. I liked you in the beginning, Y/N. But I’ve also noticed how you look at your roommates. I sincerely don’t wanna be your second, no, wait, your fourth choice.” Shit. “Felix and I have been good friends for some time and he always reassured me. One thing let to another and I realised maybe it wasn’t serious from my side either.”

Wow. So it is obvious. You weren’t aware of being so bad at hiding your feelings. Maybe you judged Hyunjin a bit too easily.

“Thank you for being honest. I wished you would have done it like this from the start,” you say, meaning it.

Maybe you’re better off as friends. Hopefully you can go back to it one day.

“I’m sorry. I should have. You’re right.” He gives you a warm smile, before pulling you closer and you let him. “So, does this mean we’re fine?”

“There’s still another elephant in the room to address,” you say, squinting your eyes while looking up at him with a strict look on your face.

You’re aware that Hyunjin is one of your followers that’s pretty active. Not just regarding paying and interacting but also defending you. You’re glad to know that. It makes you feel a tiny bit safer.

“Yeah… we can stop watching your videos,” he immediately says.

Pardon?

“‘We’? You’re watching them together?”

“Hey, no kink shaming please! I know a lot more about you and your little fantasies.” He nudges you, tickling you in the process and you playfully push him away. “Jokes aside, if it makes you uncomfortable we’ll stop.”

“I’m fine with it. Really,” you tell him.

You are, right?

Well, Hyunjin is the last person that could make you feel uncomfortable. And if his partner is fine with it, you don’t mind.

What Chan and the others might think about it… well…

“Not gonna kink shame you either, darling. If you’re ever taking guests, hit me up.”

Oh, God. You’re doomed. Fucking doomed.

“Hey, and Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

He gives you another small smile, “I’m not sure how much you’re on track with it and I don’t wanna scare you. But if any bitch ever says the slightest shit to you, I’ll protect you, okay?”

“Thank you.”

You get woken up by the front door opening, instantly reaching for your phone that reads the time ‘01:43’.

Right. Jisung and Chan must be back from their work trip. The latter hasn’t responded to you until now. You wonder if he knows what happened between Minho and you. But it doesn’t make sense. Why would he suspect such a thing?

You’ve thought about how you’re gonna tell him about it. You’re not a couple, however it kind of felt like going behind his back and cheating. The encounter with Minho differs a lot from Jisung, who has only ever been involved with Chan being present.

But you’re a free woman, right? You can decide so to spend your time with. Chan isn’t your boyfriend. Although it feels like you’re his girlfriend. If that makes any sense. In your head you are.

However, then there’s also Jisung. And Minho. Maybe Hyunjin was quite right with only ever being the fourth choice.

You shake your head and brush those thoughts off. Unlocking your phone, your scroll a bit through the comments of the latest snippets of the livestream you posted. Finding yet another not so nice comment.

[ jwn_2002 👅 ]: that’s what real sluts look like. always ready to please a man. 

Dizziness is roaming around in your head. You feel nauseous, totally uncomfortable. Reading these words lets pure disgust enter your body.

Then another comment from a familiar stranger appears.

[ hyunwoo_98 😜 ]: i wonder what else she would do. can’t think about anything else these days except for her hot body 🔥

You decide to close the app and place your phone away. Your heart is beating a bit faster than it should, but then again you get anxious pretty easily. Maybe it’s not that serious. Or at least you desperately try to convince yourself that it’s like that.

Knock knock.

Fuck. That startled you.

“Y/N, are you asleep?”

It’s Chan. And suddenly you feel all calm again. Because that’s what kind of effect he’s got on you.

“N-No. You can come in.”

As your roommate enters, you give your rabbit shaped night lamp a little push so it brightens the place in a dim shade.

Chan is dressed in sweatpants he probably put on just a couple of minutes ago and a tight tank top. You wonder if he did that on purpose.

“I’m sorry I didn’t reply. It was kinda busy over there.”

Jisung did reply though.

“How are you?”

You make some space so he can crawl under the blanket with you, all naturally. “I’m alright. You too? Exhausting day, right?”

He nods, “Hm. Is it okay if I stay here for a bit.”

“Sure,” you say with a smile. Everything seems to be okay after all. You can talk about the Minho thing and those comments tomorrow. For now you just wanna be close with your childhood best friend and feel safe.

“Channie?”

“Yeah, baby?” he asks in a husky voice and you already feel comforted again. That’s the effect he has on you.

“You remember what we talked about the other day,” you start, “regarding you touching and fucking me when I’m asleep?”

God, Chan fears he might just come in his pants. You can’t just say that to him after two days of neglecting his needs due to being away from him.

“Of course I do. What do you wanna tell me, princess?”

“If you feel like it, you can use me, Daddy. I’m always here for you, you know?”

Stupidly enough, these words don’t only let all blood get transported down to his cock but also allow his heart to do jumping jacks inside his chest.

Here for him to get some stress off?

Or here for him if he needs a shoulder to cry on?

The lines are starting to get blurry. Still, he places a soft kiss on your temple. “I can’t wait to wake you up tomorrow morning then. Sleep well, sweetheart.”

Chan wakes up earlier than usual, perhaps due to being so excited about the fact you’re gonna try something new. Yes, there’s still a lot to talk about. He’s read those comments to and is sure you have as well.

But this time of the day is about pleasuring your body the way you deserve. He props up the camera, trying to get a good ankle and places the masks on his and your eyes—trying not to wake you.

You store a bit in your sleep but when a cute little snoring sound drops from your lips, he’s sure you’re deeply occupied in your dreams again. Hopefully, he’s part of it. Perhaps his upcoming ideas will help.

Chan is careful, both trying not to wake you and feeling a bit nervous about the fact that you’re allowing him to touch you in your sleep. He knows you trust him immensely, this isn’t any news. Still, that’s another level he hasn’t expected. Yet again, this plays games with his head and heart.

He starts with slight touches, going up and down your side, sneaking his fingers under your shirt. The blankets are pushed aside, just like he's pulling up that pyjama top to expose your breasts to himself and the camera. You look alluring like this, almost innocent, so opposite to the side he’s been getting to know these past weeks.

Chan’s hand wanders down, between your thighs and as if you’re on autopilot, you spread your legs for him. He takes his time when he plays and teases your pussy, circling his thumb around your clit just like he knows you enjoy the most. And you’re wet. Dripping wet. Almost making a full mess on your sheets.

Then you let out a little moan. What he isn’t aware of is the fact that you woke up a couple of second ago, feeling the mask on your skin although by you’re trying to keep your eyes closed. This is so much fun. You wished you could wake up like this every day.

Chan continues, dipping two fingers inside your hole, stretching you out. Whimpers escape your mouth, echoing through the room. And he’s already rock-hard against you, his dick pressed against your ass. Chan doesn’t bother sleeping with clothes on, you’ve known this even before your arrangement started, so you’re not surprised.

He’s surprised indeed though, when you reach behind yourself, wrapping your hands around his length in an attempt to show him you’re fully awake and absolutely ready.

“Please…” you whine, scooting closer to him.

Chan wastes no time, aligning the tip of his cock with your aching hole, before he pushes inside you. It’s a sequence of events that has happened so many times by now, that feels so familiar, you’re getting used to it a bit too much.

He pushes fully in, letting out a breathy groan, before he starts moving.

“What a good girl. Even letting me fuck her in her sleep.”

“Yes, Daddy,” is all you let out.

The bed frame is hitting the wall, but all your roommates should know what’s going on anyway so you don’t care anymore at all.

“Good little slut, hm? You’ve missed my cock this much, you’re already creaming around me? Tightening around my dick like a good girl?”

You hastily nod, bringing your fingers between your legs to play with yourself. Chan pushes your hand away, deciding to do it himself. This is about you. This is about making you feel good and worshipping your body.

And filming a video. God, he almost forgot about the camera.

“Come on,” he whispers, “I know you’re close.”

He’s damn right about that. It doesn’t take you long to reach your high and Chan follows soon, pulling out of you before he scatters his seeds all over your ass.

Your roommate turns off the camera, before he places a soft kiss on your cheek.

“I’ve missed you too.”

“It’s so relaxing to have a day off and sleep in,” Chan says.

He made sure to give you the full programm of aftercare, still the two of you are cuddling in your bed after changing the sheets.

“It’s always time to sleep in. I’m a freelancer, you know? I’m able to choose my working hours,” you giggle.

He chuckles too, “What a girl boss you are, baby. Look at you making business like that. So hot.”

”Chan, stop joking.”

“‘m sorry,” he says. ”Shall we check the statistics?”

“Sure. Uhm—but before that… can I talk to you about something?”

“Always, baby. What’s going on?”

It's now or never, right?

You don’t want Chan to take it the wrong way as if you’re keeping secrets from him. On top of that, filming Minho and yourself also has the purpose of potentially making him part of the team. And the co-founder should be informed about that.

“When you two were gone, Minho and I talked about this cam girl thing—he somehow found out, funny and long story—so we decided that it makes most sense he could be part of it too and filmed a little video, nothing severe, and I wanted to ask if you’re fine–“

“You’re kidding me, right?”

Oh. You’ve never seen him like this before. Chan looks like he just witnessed a ghost.

“N-No… look, one thing let to another… we didn’t have sex in the conventional way—“

The fuck is that supposed to mean?

“Did he touch you?”

“Y-Yes…”

He closes his eyes.

“You guys filmed it?”

“We d-did…”

His jaw clenches.

“And saved it in the drafts.”

“Channie–“

“Then I don’t know why you don’t call a spade a spade,” he hisses.

Fuck. He’s fuming. He’s angry to the highest level. You’ve only seen him like this a handful of times and none of them were a nice experience.

“Channie…”

“I need a moment. I’m sorry,” he says, suddenly getting up from the bed. Your best friend gets dressed, putting on his sweatpants and tank top from last night.

You follow him, standing up too.

“Why are you reacting this way? I don’t get it,” you ask. Isn’t he overreacting a bit? Sure, you made a business decision without him but that’s not a reason to be so pissed off.

Because I’m in love with you. And I’m jealous.

“You didn’t have an issue with Jisung joining us either,” you point out.

“It's because you talked to me about him. That’s fine. I just don’t like you hiding secrets from me,” he explains, avoiding eye contact.

“But I told you now,” you state.

He sighs. “You should have told me sooner. Maybe that’s why I didn’t reply to you, Y/N. Because I know you don’t value our friendship as much as I do.”

What do all these accusations mean?

“You don’t think that. Chan, you’re being weird,” you say with a forced giggle to deal with the situation that’s making you quite nauseous again.

“You’re being weird, Y/N,” he spits back. “Why do you need to bring all these men into this? First Jisung, which I was fine with. Now Minho. Who’s next? Hyunjin? Changbin?”

He’s loud. His voice has increased its volume what feels like a thousand decibel.

“Stop it,” you say, almost whispering.

“No, you don’t get out of this so easily,” he shouts again.

“Stop yelling at me,” you speak, tears pricking at your lower lash line.

“Y/N, I’m being serious, this shit is getting out of hand and all those comments, we haven’t even addressed this and need to do something about it so there’s no time for you bringing even more drama into–“

This is too much. You’re becoming loud now too, when you interrupt him, “So you’re blaming me? You’re blaming me for your stupid ideas?”

He scoffs. Now you’re being unfair. “No, you don’t get to say this. We decided to make this blog together. Don’t pretend as if I talked you into it.”

“Whatever,” you brush it off, turning around.

“That’s always your reaction, right?”

“Stop fighting with me,” is all that you manage to say.

“Sorry I’m trying to discuss shit with you that’s important to me. Apparently not to you. I’m getting out of here. I need space,” he replies, sprinting towards your door and leaving your bedroom.

“Go on, then. You can come back when you calmed the fuck down,” you shout after him.

Tears are running down your face even before you’re noticing it. You sink down to your carpet, letting out sniffles and whimpers.

You get startled, when your phone vibrates, indicating you received a message.

[ Sungie 💚🎮 ]: Are you okay? Wanna come to my room and play some video games? 

[ Sungie 💚🎮 ]: Or do you need space? I can make some food for you. Promises I don’t burn down the kitchen.

You wipe away the tears with your Chan’s sweater you’re wearing, typing a quick reply.

[ You ]: video games sound good

[ Sungie 💚🎮 ]: okay baby take your time yeah?

Hopefully Jisung will be able to comfort you instead.

GOOGLE FORM FOR REQUESTING CONTENT ⭐️

“Yeah, sure. Come on. Spit it out. Was it something with the boss? Some stuff Changbin and I didn’t notice?”

Speaking of Changbin—he went out for food, on his way to bring some meals for lunch break while Chan and Jisung are still trying to make this song work. Without success.

“It’s not related to the company,” he says.

“Oh—what’s it then? Wait, now that I’m thinking about it… you’ve been out of it for some time. You don’t seem as focused as you usually are and being unfocused is usually my speciality for obvious reasons,” Jisung elaborates.

“I’m… it’s just a lot,” he sums it up as best as he’s able to.

Jisung scoffs, “What’s a lot? Dude, listen. I’m always here to help you but you’ve gotta–“

“Chill, man. It’s about Y/N. The whole business thing,” Chan finally spills.

“It’s getting a lot?”

“Obviously. There are some comments happening again and again and I don’t know what to do,” he states, sounding somewhat helpless.

Jisung has never experienced him like this before. Usually, Chan is the person in the friend group who takes care of everyone. Who’s the one the others come to when they’re in trouble. Who’s the one that tells them everything is gonna be okay.

“Creepy strangers?” he asks.

“Yes, more than that,” Chan admit.

“Yikes. That sounds horrible. Men can be… disgusting,” Jisung says, severely overwhelmed with those news too.

“I’m glad Changbin isn’t here right now, he would have said ‘I told you so’,” Chan adds, rolling his eyes.

“It doesn’t matter, really. The decisions are made. We’ll find a solution.” It’s the best he can do to comfort his friend right now. “Is that all there is?”

“I guess,” the older one shrugs his shoulders.

“Chan, look,” Jisung begins again, giving his attention fully to his roommate. “I’ve always thought it was obvious that I have a very intense crush on Y/N—hence why I watched her videos not even realising you were the dude in the frame—for years now but if you like her–“

“No, stop. Jisung, please,” he immediately interrupts him. “Don’t go where I’m thinking you’re going.”

“But… if you like her… I’m… I guess I’m fine–“ he adds, looking absolutely nervous and self conscious and Chan hates himself for it.

“I said, no,” the oldest repeats.

“No, what?”

“I don’t want you to always put yourself second, okay? Be a little more selfish from time to time. Stop being such a damn people pleaser,” he hisses.

Jisung’s jaw clenches. Maybe it’s indeed getting a lot. Maybe it was a dumb idea to join Chan and you in your wild business. Maybe it’s stupid to have sex with his crush when he knows Chan—your older, successful, athletic and overall charming roommate—is definitely interested in you too although he doesn’t admit it.

Jisung wouldn’t have a chance anyway, right?

“Okay, I get it. No fucking reason to yell at me,” Jisung says, avoiding eye contact as his voice becomes smaller. He clears his throat, bringing his focus back on the screen.

“I’m sorry…” Chan immediately apologises, meaning it. He can’t recognise himself anymore. All because of his intense feelings for you. Which is why he sticks with his lie, deciding it’s the best decision. “I don’t like her like that, okay? So, no reason to even compete and discuss, we’re all fine.”

Jisung isn’t sure if he can trust him but gives him a warm smile nonetheless, before he gets back to work when Changbin enters the studio they’re renting today.

When Chan reaches for his phone, he notices that there’s still this message from you that he hasn’t replied to yet. Because he can’t. He’s avoiding you for a very obvious reason. It’s unfair. It’s cowardly. But he fears that being with you would shed his heart into pieces when he’s in a space like this at the moment.

God, he sounds so overdramatic.

Then he re-reads the text. Stares a little too long at the emojis he’s carefully chosen for you.

[ Y/N 🧸❤️ ]: I hope you’re having a succesful day! Fingers crossed 🤞🏻☺️

Then he gets hit with another message.

[ Y/N 🧸❤️ ]: I miss you

He’s dreaming, isn’t he?

God, he can’t go that way. He simply can’t. You’re too deep in this chaos already and Chan knows he wouldn’t be able to provide what you truly need.

There are things in life that he’s inexperienced in too. Mainly caused by his tight schedule, not much free time and insecurities. But he’s never been in an actual serious relationship before. So, he keeps avoiding it at all costs. Knowing it’s better to save his own heart and much more importantly—yours.

[ Sungie 🎮💚 ]: GUESS WHAT they wanna make a contract with us!!!

Finally someone texted you out of these two. Of course, it’s Jisung. You try to not think about Chan ignoring you for over a day now, when you read your other roommate’s text. These are awesome news.

[ You ]: ahhhh sungie that makes me so happy!!! we’re gonna celebrate this once you’re back tomorrow 🥰

You immediately receive a message back.

[ Sungie 🎮💚 ]: oh yes we will 😌 looking forward to seeing you again :) I’ve missed you

You’re a bit flustered. Jisung has been on your mind ever since that first time of the three of you and the filthy scene in Chan’s car.

You remember what he said.

‘Don’t make me fall in love with you.’

Then you told him it’s too late for it. Accused him for feeling the same. And he didn’t reply. 

Why didn’t he reply?

For the longest time you‘ve thought Jisung is just incredibly horny and a bit of a pervert. What if there’s more to it?

To test the waters, you reply.

[ You ]: i’ve missed you too

He instantly changes the topic. Weird.

[ Sungie 🎮💚 ]: i hope the apartment building is safe with you and minho being alone there. or any arson i should know about?

You chuckle.

[ You ]: jiiiii it’s fine lmao we’re getting along no worries

Maybe more than getting along.

[ Sungie 🎮💚 ]: that’s great!!! very surprising but great!!! maybe we can all play monopoly again some time without one of you throwing the game board off the table 🙏🏻

[ You ]: I think it’s in the nature of monopoly to end in a disaster no matter if friends or enemies ;)

Jisung sends you a few emojis including “😜😅😘”—making him look like a fuckboy when he’s quite the opposite. Utterly, stupidly in love with his friend ever since you moved in together. He’s so absolutely doomed.

You’re at the other side of the country, currently meeting up with Cecilia, your best friend. For some time you wondered why you don’t have many female friends. Except for Cece there’s only Yeji—your former colleague—who happens to be in another stage of your life and as a newly led wife and young mum she just doesn’t have time for you these days. Which is fine.

You came to the conclusion though that it’s not the fact you don’t have many female friends. Looking at it seriously, you don’t have many friends in general. As sad as it sounds. But you prefer to keep your circle small and close.

“So, you’re having a spicy video blog with your roommate? Which one? It’s Minho, isn’t it?” she asks, taking a sip from her iced americano, while taking off her leather jacket since they turned the heater on a little too high in here.

You couldn’t hold back anymore. You told her. Yes, it’s not the greatest idea to talk to so many people from the real world about it but you’re sure you can trust Cecilia. She used to be part of the business after all too.

The only issue: she’s Chan’s ex. Yes, it’s been years since they dated and it wasn’t for too long but still serious. Up until this day neither of them has revealed the exact downfall of their past relationship to you.

‘Different perspectives on life’ is what they called it. Whatever the hell that means.

“Gosh, don’t tell me it’s Jisung,” she thinks further. “Can he even satisfy a woman?”

Cecilia is… direct in the way she speaks. Not thinking before talking most of the times so it’s both a surprise to her and whoever listens when she’s opening her mouth.

“He’s a gamer, of course he can,” you chuckle.

She looks at you confused. “What do you mean?”

“You wouldn’t know, Cece. Don’t underestimate men that sit in front of their keyboard typing all day, with their fluffy hair and nerdy look,” you explain.

She blushes, “Y/N, you sound pathetically in love, that’s so cute. He’s obviously not my type but I get what you mean!”

“Thank you,” you say, taking a sip from your coffee.

“Isn’t it a bit… impulsive though?” she questions.

God dammit. Yes of course it is. You’ve been trying to push that fact away ever since you and Chan started.

“Changbin said so too,” you admit, leaving out the rest of this side story. “It definitely was a decision that I should have thought through a little longer.”

You’re avoiding eye contact now and she notices it, “Baby, are you okay?”

Cece’s hand is placed on your own, searching for any signs of discomfort. She might be harsh and a bit too honest from time to time. But if shit hits the fan, she’s always there to protect you.

“It’s… it’s been lots of fun, like, making the videos,” you admit, getting all flustered again.

“I can imagine,” your friend chuckles. “It’s good you’re experiencing good things after everything you’ve been through. Maybe Jisung is the right one for that, he’s always very gentle and attentive with you. I’ve noticed it. But what’s bothering you? The business itself?”

“Y-Yeah. People become more demanding,” you confess. The thought itself makes your stomach turn and you’re sure it’s not caused by the caffeine in your system.

“It was the same for me when I still did those… feet pics in college,” Cecilia begins. You didn’t wanna start that topic since it’s more serious than it might seem. Your friend didn’t exactly have such a good experience, to say the least. “We live in an impatient society. People are demanding. They need more. They ask for it. And they want it now. They’re never satisfied.”

“You get it!” you join her.

“You’re covering your faces, right?”

“Of course, I may be naive but not that much,” you giggle.

She squeezes your hand, “Good. So, your fans are what—demanding, rude, below the line?”

“The other day someone shared a security camera file of a video we filmed on the subway train,” you admit. Anxiety rushes through your veins thinking back to those comments again. You feel dizzy.

“Y/N, you little minx, I’ve always known you’ve got it in you…”

“Cece…”

“I’m sorry, darling,” she apologises immediately and then her tone and mimic shifts drastically.

“You can send me a screenshot. I’ll look it up and figure out if we can track them down if you like. Don’t you ever keep this shit for yourself again, okay? I might be a bit insensitive in the way I speak from time to time but you can count on me, yeah?”

“Thank you,” you let out. You can always count on her.

“Not for that, love. I’m your best friend, more than that. You’re like a little sister to me and I will always protect you, okay?” she reminds you.

“Okay.”

Cecilia gives you a little smile and orders another piece of cake to share when the waitress walks past your table.

“If you receive any comments like this, send them to me. I’ll see what I can do. And if things get worse, I won’t hesitate to go to the police with you,” she promises.

Relief washes down your shoulder realising there’s someone who’s got your back. You should have talked to her so much sooner than Changbin. They may view this whole sex work thing from the same critical perspective—as you know from her—but she’s a lot more diplomatic. Which is surprising considering we’re talking about Cecilia.

“It’s not that serious, Cece,” you decide to calm her down nonetheless. But that’s what your best friend thought too back then—before she got doxxed and it got even worse with unwanted visitors in front of her student dormitory.

Not yet, Cecilia thinks. She wants to protect you at all costs so you don’t have to go through what she went through. Especially when you’re doing a lot more explicit things than she used to do—that could ruin your entire life if the wrong people found out.

“Cece, Y/N, hi. Nice to see you,” a male voice suddenly greets you. The man is wearing a jacket that reads SMRT—Seoul Metropolitan Rapid Transport—on the back.

“Juwon, I didn’t know you had a day off—wait, you’re in your uniform,” Cecilia greets her younger brother.

They’ve always had a strong connection with another and you remember it as if it was yesterday when he always annoyed the two of you when you were children.

“I’m on my lunch break. How’re you guys? Everything fine? How’s it going, Y/N?” he asks.

You give him a soft smile, “I’m alright! How’s work going?”

“Shit ton of stuff to do. It's been a lot lately. I wish I had time to explain it. Some issues in our team,” he sums it up as best as he can.

“Sorry to hear that,” you reply.

“Ah, it’s not your fault, noona,” he scratches the back of his head. “Don’t worry about it.”

“You’re taking your vitamins, yeah? Enough water and sleep?” Cece asks him, reaching for his arm to pull him closer like a mother would do.

“I do,” he reassures his older sister, rolling his eyes. Sometimes she still speaks to him as if he’s ten years old despite their age gap not even being that high.

“Great, if you need anything, let me know. Eat well, yeah?” she tells him.

He’s carrying a bright smile on his face, “Have a nice day, ladies.”

“Gosh, he looks exhausted,” you state, once Juwon exists the coffee shop.

“Yeah. Long story short—for some time, they thought a hacker might steal and sell sensitive data to criminals but now there are more and more hints that it’s someone from the team,” she explains.

You raise one of your eyebrows, “What on earth? What kind of data?”

“Personal data like phone numbers for phishing companies but also video material from the public places—wait…”

Cecilia and you stare at each other, both obviously thinking the same thing.

“D’you think Juwon might know more?”

“I’m not sure,” Cece shrugs her shoulders. “They’re currently trying to figure it out. I’ll ask him later, though. He could be useful in this.”

“God, my heart is bursting out of my chest,” you say, hasitily blinking.

“Less caffeine for you, babes.”

“Tsk, as if caffeine has ever worked on me,” you chuckle.

“Not my point.” Cecilia’s gaze suddenly shifts to her phone. “Oh—Areum texted me.”

“The girl you’ve been seeing?” 

“Hm, I’m gonna ask her to be my girlfriend today,” she admits, holding back a giggle. There are stars in your best friend’s eyes.

“Cece, I’m gonna cry. This is so wholesome. Keep me updated,” you tell her.

It’s awkward. Once again. Maybe because you’re making it that way in your head.

Or because you just poured your entire heart out to Minho about your almost-relationship with Hyunjin. You don’t know how you even got here.

“Tell me what’s going on, pretty.”

At this point you’re convinced your annoying roommate owns some magical superpowers. Why does he know that you’re worrying again?

Well, to be fair. Anyone would see. You’re not exactly doing your best when it comes to hiding it.

“Huh?”

“So what? Hyunjin and you were a thing and now you aren’t anymore. You’re not into him anyway,” he states.

“What do you mean?”

“It’s obvious you’re in love with Chan,” Minho takes a pause and you don’t read much into it, “so why worry about a guy who wasn’t meant to be with you anyway?”

“You know, Minho, sometimes it’s not about the fact that it ended but how it ended. He did it so abruptly, just to get in a relationship with his boyfriend a week later. It feels like shit, no matter if it was real from my side,” you explain yourself.

He smirks, “So it wasn’t real from your side, was it?”

“What would you know?” you scoff, leaning back on the couch right next to him.

“You think I’ve never been in love before?” he asks you. You’re sure he’s doing it as part of his how-much-can-I-tease-Y/N project.

“Minho, jerking off to a girl is not love,” you reply, rolling your eyes.

“Ask Jisung,” he jokes, not realising he’s basically spilled the fact that his best friend has a crush on you. Has had for years.

“Huh?”

“Forget it,” he brushes it off.

You prop yourself up, adjusting your posture when you notice you’ve turned into a shrimp again and your back will thank you for that later. “What are you getting out of this?”

“Out of what?”

“Spending time with me,” you add.

He sighs, severely annoyed, “For the last time, even if it might not seem like it, I don’t hate you, Y/N. I enjoy spending time with you.”

“Can someone pinch me?” you gasp.

“Stop being so unserious. If I didn’t like you I wouldn’t have done what I did with you last night,” he reminds you with a wink.

“Right. You didn’t even get anything out of it. I-I can return the favour,” you offer.

Yet another impulsive decision.

Or not?

You’ve thought about it for some time, after all. Might it still be impulsive?

“You don’t have to,” he immediately declines. But he wants to, doesn’t he?

“I would like to though,” you tell him.

“I prefer being the part that’s giving pleasure,” Minho confesses.

You scoot closer to him, until you’re eyes to eyes. “Why?”

“I like being in control,” he whispers.

“I like losing control,” you reply with a smirk,

He grins, “I know. You’re impulsive. Sometimes a bit too much, that’s when I’m here to catch you.”

The last sentence has a stupid little effect on the butterflies inside your stomach. So, you shift the conversation in order to protect yourself.

“You’re gonna continue talking in those pseudo-philosophical paragraphs or finish what you started last night?”

“You really want that?” he asks for consent, his gaze flickering down to your lips.

“If you’re worrying about Chan, it’s fine. We’re not a couple. He doesn’t see me like that anyway.”

It’s about Jisung. He can’t do that to Jisung, right? But Minho has liked you for the longest time too. And the younger one didn’t ask him either before he put his dick in you for some views on your adult blog.

But this is different.

“We can film it,” he suddenly suggests.

You tilt your head, “You wanna join the business?”

“I’m not opposed to it,” is what he says.

“Me neither. But I can’t make such decisions when Chan isn’t with me. Or Jisung. We should have a talk with them before that,” you admit.

“You’re absolutely right. Okay, look. We can make a video. Just not upload it. I’m not gonna have sex with you in a heteronormative way until you talk to them, alright?”

He’s correct. Minho ‘only’ went down on you last night. Still, it was already enough to give you the best orgasm of your life. He made you squirt until the sheets were ruined—no one has achieved that before. Not even Chan. And you wonder why.

“Sounds like a plan,” you agree.

“What now?”

“I want you, Minho,” you admit.

“It’s not sex. I’m just making you feel good, pretty. That’s all.”

Hm. It’s silly how the two of you are almost entirely naked, as Minho has got you spread out on his mattress, busy trying to convince you and his guilty conscience that what you’re doing right now isn’t sex.

His hard cock—the tip angry and glistening with pre-come—is attached to your drenched underwear, gliding over your covered bundle of nerves, stimulating you in the most edging way possible.

“Fuck– sir–“

It’s not enough to make you come yet, but enough to make you lose your mind entirely. The pink cotton fabric is soaked by yours and his juices, a few shades darker than it usually is.

“Look at you being such a desperate slut for me,” he chuckles. Minho wraps his hand around his shaft, giving himself a few slow strokes, before he slaps his dick against your panties. You let out a high pitched squeal, before a moan follows.

With his other hand he’s busy getting the right angle with his phone camera, as he starts moving his length over you again.

“T-Take it off, now, please,” you whine.

He chuckles again, pushing your ruined underwear to the side, no time to get rid of it completely. Plus, that’s the way you like it anyway.

Minho starts rubbing his dick over your now exposed clit, flesh pressed against flesh as you’re making a mess all over him. You don’t know what it is—the forbidden part of the scene or Minho’s skills—but he seems to arouse you way too easily. Arousal is gushing out of your hole, spread all over him and running down your thighs until it spills over his duvet.

Without even noticing it you start grinding against him, with friction you’re trying to increase the feeling that’s building up in your lower stomach.  

“What a whore you are… so needy, so pathetic. Come on, baby. Show me what you’ve got.”

Is this what he meant by being mean? If so, you want more of it. You need him to grab you by the hips, manhandle you, throw you around as he likes and use your body as he pleases. God, what a dream come true.

But you know you can’t do that. As twisted as it sounds. However, is there truly a difference? Haven’t the lines been crossed way before that? Way before Minho touched you for the first time?

“Sir—please,” you hiccup, your motions becoming uncoordinated.

Minho takes the lead again, rubbing himself over your wetness, as you clench around nothing.

“You wanna be a good whore for me, darling?”

“Yes! Y-Yes!” you cry out, brain already shut off.

“Then lay there prettily and let me do the work, okay?”

You nod, giving him a small smile when his eyes interlock with your own to make sure you’re still okay.

Minho guides his cock away, before a hot string of saliva collides directly with your clit. Then he’s back again. Gliding over your sensitive area, your pulsating nub aching for more. He adores the view of your tits bouncing, while he continues with his motions—making him a bit sad about the fact his hands are already busy. This has to wait for another time.

“Hmm, just like that,” he encourages you when yet another whimper falls from your lips, “I’m not even inside you and your dumb little brain has already shut off, huh?”

You giggle, “S-so good.”

He likes being in control. You like losing control.

Nothing wrong with that.

Your inner thighs are aching from spreading your legs apart, but you ignore it, especially when that sweet feeling of relief finally washes over you. Minho keeps rubbing his dick along your slit, right before he follows—his seeds are shooting over your tummy, a hot sensation hitting your skin, as he lets out a low grunt.

His fingers come to collect a few droplets smearing them over your clit, before he guides it towards your mouth. Your roommate makes sure to not have your nose and eyes in the frame, when he records you licking them clean.

Minho clicks the button that stops the video, before he whispers, “You were so fucking good for me, Y/N. Come on, let me take care of you, okay?”

You should buy some type of anti-bug-spray. These butterflies are gonna drive you insane.

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