Y=mx+bitch

True!

Who the fuck are you???

When youre a kid youre like wtf adults are making themselves sick with poisons and when youre an adult youre like i need more poisons ASAP

i’m very self aware. which unfortunately hasn’t solved anything

on their clit like morse code

"S.O.S. we're going down"

fuck dont be funnier than me on my own post

... - . -. -.. . -.-.

She STEN on my DEC until I'm never heard from again.

the shit you do to make a dying phone work when you dont wanna buy a new phone is amazing. my phone no longer charges unless i plug and unplug the charger exactly ten times & then flip the charger around then it works. I dont want to say i have to fuck the port a little bit first but i have to fuck the port a little bit first

how many hands you got

two? don’t see how that’s relevant

that’s still four people

will smith isn’t gay. he has a wife and three beautiful, talented children

I can’t believe this post predicted the live action Aladdin genie

If we lose tumblr how will we ever replace these posts in which every reply feels like a punch in the face

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

*grabbing mlm shippers by the shoulders* guys nobody needs to be the twink. nobody needs to be the sub. nobody needs to be the femboy. they can both be big fat hairy men who bask in each others masculinity or they can both be unspeakable monstrous creatures with inhuman genitalia it’s okay I’m holding your hand. Let me show you the way

it cannot eat halloween…

[image: A small black bat hangs inside a jack-o-lantern, gnawing on the flesh. /end]

Lets dissect uncle to find his wish gland

Where do you think the comma goes

see shit like this is the reason that it’s so hard to turn my back on this website. Where else, pray tell, are you going to find this kind of quality nonsense.

west virginia

Mount him, mama

Scary Elvis

Woah mama ive been summoned

AAAHHHH OH FUCK!