married to the worm

I think being literal is a plague in music right now. I don’t really want to hear songs that refer to concepts like “emotional labor” or “narcissism” by name. Step around the issue. Make me feel it from an angle that isn’t purely expository!

Yesterday I heard a song that went (with not as much exaggeration as you would think) "you can get into my car. It's a BMW 350 with a 3.0-liter inline six and optional leather trim and a manual transmission and it can drive on the road or the highway because I have a license to drive my car. you can get into the passenger seat which is where a passenger goes because I want you to get into my car. and we can go to Berlin or Hamburg or Osnabrück or Recklinghausen or Mülheim an der Ruhr in my car. my car is very fast. do you want to be in my car" and then I found out the singer is from New York, and if this was written by someone German it would be kind of understandable because that's just how Germans are, but it wasn't.

🦠 #my crobe

in my little pony universe youd go to a job interview and theyd be like so how does your cutiemark reflect your dedication to this position. And every time youd have to spew some bullshit about how your cutiemark of two tennis rackets actually means youre a team player and good at multitasking and view the market like a playing field. or whatever. and you wouldnt even get the job

Guys maybe someday I'll finish and post fanfiction again. That was a fun time. When I was doing that.

I really like this website because somebody will be like “there’s nothing wrong with darting out from behind a parked car into traffic, bootlicker” and you can be like okay this clearly evolved from a valid point about how the US is too car-centric. But something happened to it.

everyones got that one neurosis they cant even complain about on tumblr

this website is always on some stupid insular drama where some idiot blogger named poobster-498 has said something controversial and stupid and then the most mediocre critical thinkers of the website get together and decide that everybody in the world can be categorized into pro-poobster or anti-poobster camps. and they invent fake slurs for each other like the pro-poobsters are called poobshits and the anti-poobsters are called pooblerites. and people will send you asks demanding that you clarify where you stand on poobster and "I've never heard of this person and I don't care about this at all" is an unacceptable answer to either side of this inane drama and automatically fashions you into a member of whichever opposing camp. when in reality you just truly have no idea who the fuck poobster-498 even is.

finally, a storage bench you can fuck

[laughing] oh, sorry, no thanks, I’m good, my sexuality is completely devoid of socially mediated fantasies predicated on the ubiquity of power and subjugation, and of symbols in general

the meaning of life? is to make your bedroom as comfy as possible. that's it that's the purpose