Yasha

I had a dream that Joe Biden kept trying to sneak back into the white house to become the president again and he had a variety of silly disguises like in one he was wearing a big moustache and top hat and introduced himself as Job Iden and tried to sell trump snake oil and trump was super interested until his moustache fell off and then JD vance was like "wait a minute.. that's joe biden!!" amd he was like "welp, gotta run, see ya later jack!" and then all the evil white house staff were shaking their heads cus joe biden almost sneaked into the white house and the newest aid was there and she was like "That was a close call, Mr President" and his new aide was actually kamala harris wearing a big cartoon wig and they were all too distracted by joe biden to notice

sorry for being annoying [remembers that practicing gratitude instead of shame is better for my mental health and my relationships] thank you for letting me be annoying with you

have been finding myself thanking my girlfriend for being so patient and understanding with me and it makes me feel so insane. what do you mean this person isn't secretly conspiring against me and despises me for existing. what the fuuuck what the fuuuuuuuck

worry not my lord, allow me to unscrew that jar for you. i would not want for you to strain your hand or break a nail. alright. hmm. HMMMM. HNNNGRGHHHHHH. HNNGGHHHH HRRRRRGHHH. AAAAAARGHHHHHHH fucking. squire fetch me my grippy gloves

never mind, I can make it!!

crazy how the printer is the only piece of tech that acts up like that almost every day of its life. and we just accept it

i don't think i've ever met a printer that actually wanted to be a printer. i think most printers have dreams of being on the stage

nothing will make you think "i have got to get weirder" more than finally feeling comfortable enough around other people to admit to interests of yours that you think make you a freak and a weirdo only to realize with a combination of embarrassment and relief that you're like a normie to them

"sicko feedback loop" is a warrior's bond stronger and more meaningful than marriage

"there is no way you're not using chatgpt for at least a few things here and there no matter your stance on it" what the FUCK are you talking about

MOTHER OF GOD

ARE YOU FUCKIN

OH GOD ITS BACK

Oh my god

god i love it when gay people are in evil toxic codependent love with each other

my girlfriend has decided the way she wants to consume my blood is 1) bite a big vein in my neck 2) let the blood drip down my tits 3) lick it off from there

i hate when something violent happens to a right wing politician and every left leaning pundit and politician gets on their soap box about how "violence isn't the answer" as if the right wing ideology doesn't inherently encourage violence.

R.I.P. The 2976 American people that lost their lives on 9/11 and R.I.P. the 48,644 Afghan and 1,690,903 Iraqi and 35000 Pakistani people that paid the ultimate price for a crime they did not commit

i love the phrase "sex pervert" like. as opposed to what? abstinence pervert?

i think they're called catholics

Nothing slapped my shit back into place like someone pointing out that the "genius gifted child with so much potential who got burnout and mental illness" is just the nerd equivalent to the jock "could have been a pro at sportsball if it wasn't for the injury".